Page 46 of The Notorious Lord Knightly
With a nod, he closed his hands around her waist and lifted her into the saddle. It was perfection, fit her like it had been made for her and her alone, because of course it had been. She didn’t want to consider how life with him would have been a series of surprises, like this. How often he might have brought her tears of joy. All the mornings she may have awoken grateful to have him lying beside her.
While he assisted her, a groom—who’d been waiting nearby—helped seat Millie.
Now Regina watched as Knightly mounted, his breeches pulling tight across his thighs and buttocks—mouthwateringly so. When settled, he offered her a small smile and guided his horse toward the gate. She mimicked his actions and drew parallel to him, while Millie followed at a short distance. “Do you really think this is going to work?”
“If nothing else, it’ll shift the gossip away from the book to us specifically. There’s bound to be some speculation that I’ve rethought matters and am after your hand.”
“But you haven’t and you’re not.”
“Would you want it any other way?”
“My father once told me that trust lost is difficult to regain.”
“I’d say he was a wise man, but he put that stupid stipulation on your trust. He had to know his son’s feelings toward you.”
“Sometimes I think my father had the ability to divide his life into distinct parts. He had two separate families. I suspect—or at least hope—he loved them equally. I knew his love and hope the others did as well.”
“You’re a remarkable woman, Reggie, to be so generous. I think Bremsford would rather destroy you than wish upon you any measure at all of your father’s devotion.”
“Do you know I’ve never even spoken to him? The current Lord Bremsford. My half brother. I’ve seen him from a distance, but that was some years ago. I doubt I’d recognize him if we crossed paths now.”
As they entered the park, she could sense himstudying her. “Then Bremsford doesn’t know you at all, does he? He knows only of your existence, not the woman you are.”
“I very much doubt he’d like me anyway.”
“He’d adore you.”
She laughed lightly. “You can’t help it, can you, Knightly?”
“Help what?”
“Flirting, issuing compliments.”
“I never say anything I don’t mean.” He shrugged. “Well, except when I claim I’m not Lord K and have no idea who is Anonymous.”
Had he loved her five years ago, then, when he’d regaled her with words of love? Did he loathe her now? His actions to assist her with her current trials certainly didn’t make it appear he suffered while in her company. Although perhaps his support was all simply guilt. She wondered if she’d ever know the truth of things.
Regina looked magnificent sitting astride Queen. Knight had known she would. It was the reason he’d purchased the mare for her. Over the years, he’d considered sending the beast to her as an apology but hadn’t been certain she’d accept the mare or appreciate the gesture. She’d been furious with him, rightly so, hatred reflected in the tears brimming in her eyes. He knew she wouldn’t have taken her feelings out on the horse, but he’d been unable to imagine she would have loved the steed either. Animals deserved to be adored.
However, after having placed her on the horse, hewas rather certain they were growing fond of each other, and he hoped she’d take Queen back with her when their journey through Hyde Park was completed. It was where the horse belonged, with the woman who was born to ride her.
He remembered the pride he’d always experienced having Regina at his side. It was with him now, swelling his chest, his head, and another part that it shouldn’t, but how could he look at her and not want her? He felt like a withered field in want of rain—desperate for it. He thought he’d schooled his emotions, tamped down his desperation for her, but having her near was torment, and yet he couldn’t seem to mind it. He did wish for the ease they’d once shared to return, to hear her laugh fully and completely, not with the caustic bark she now occasionally tossed his way. Sometimes she did forget her hatred of him when she smiled, and he relished those moments when her lips curled up and her eyes reflected joy.
As their horses trudged along Rotten Row, he couldn’t stop himself from saying, “You spend quite a bit of time in your book describing our first kiss.” That damned garden scene everyone was on about went on for pages.
She gave him a sidelong glance, those lush lips of hers hinting at a smile but not fully committing to granting it to him. “For me, it was a moment of awakening. I’d never imagined it could be so all-encompassing. I suppose a small part of me wanted to alert women to how it should be, how it overtakes all your common sense.”
“It’s not like that for everyone.”
“Because every man is not as experienced and skilled as you?”
After sidling Shakespeare a little nearer to her, he removed his hat because he wanted no shadows to prevent her from reading the truth in his eyes. “I’m not boasting here. What I’m about to say is simply to make a point. But I had kissed... several women before you, and yet that night was a revelation for me, a shock clear down to my boots. You owned me that night.”And every night since.
She stared at him as though he’d knocked her off her horse, and she was unable to catch her breath. He settled his hat back into place. “Was that not your experience when sampling all the men you fancied in Europe? That I was somehow different?”
She looked ahead, to the side, and back at him. “No one has ever made me feel as you do, Knightly. That realization might have fueled my need for revenge.”
He wanted to ask her more about those men, but they weren’t his business. Just as the women in his life weren’t hers. But not a one could measure up to her.
