Page 92 of The Duchess in His Bed
He remembered a time when sharing a pint with Finn would have been enough, would have put him in the right frame of mind to carry on, but tonight he’d required more. He’d required her.
Gently she picked up his hand where it rested on his abdomen and brought it to her lips. “Your knuckles are bruising. You hit Elverton.”
“Several times.”
“Is he going to leave your mother be?”
“He doesn’t have a choice. He had an apoplectic fit. Finn says it wasn’t my fault, that it was his anger, not my fist, that caused it.”
Rising up on an elbow, she brushed the hair from his brow. “How bad?”
“He can’t move, can’t speak. I almost told him that you were carrying my child, that my son would be a duke. But I realized I no longer cared what he thought. I always hoped if I achieved enough, perhaps he’d recognize me publicly. But there is no value to be found in having his regard.”
She eased over until her thigh was nestled between his legs and half her body covered a portion of his. “You’re nothing like him, you know. You’re a much better man. More honest, more real, more caring.”
But he had no title, no prestige. Being associated with a Trewlove did not elevate one’s status in Society. Even Gillie, who had married a duke, was not yet accepted by the nobs. If Lena wanted her sisters to marry nobility, Aiden was not the one to see that happen.
Reaching down, he flattened his palm over her belly. “Have you felt him?”
She placed her hand over his. “It’s too soon.”
He was disappointed not to have the opportunity to feel his child wiggling around, and that disappointment surprised him. He’d never given any thought to having a child because he’d taken so many precautions not to have one. Now he rather liked the idea of his growing within her.
“Aiden, we don’t have to stop seeing each other right away.”
“It’s best, Lena, if we call it quits now. I shouldn’t have come here tonight.” Easing her off him, he shoved himself to a sitting position and dropped his legs over the side of the bed.
She splayed her fingers over his back. “I’m glad you did.”
He wanted to roll over and take her again, which was the reason he needed to leave. Because he would always want to take her again. Would always want one more word with her. Would always want to hold her one last time. Would always long for another kiss.
Snatching up his clothes, he began to get dressed. “Will you send word after he’s born?”
“You don’t think our paths will cross before then?”
Keeping his back to her, he didn’t need to see her to know sadness was reflected in her eyes, because he heard it in her tone. “I don’t see how they would.”
“I could open a shop—”
“Don’t, Lena.” He did look back at her then, this incredible woman who had stolen his heart. “It’ll only get harder if we continue to see each other.”
“It’s hard now, Aiden. When I agreed to this stupid plan Winslow concocted, I always thought I could just walk away. I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with you.”
He slammed his eyes closed as those five words—fall in love with you—words no other woman had ever bestowed on him, washed over him, through him, around him. How powerful they were. How humbling. How breathtaking.
If he gave them back to her, if he told her how much she meant to him, they would be lost. Forever. Irrevocably. Lost.
He was her secret. That made him easier to love. How much more difficult would it be with Society’s censure surrounding them?
He opened his eyes. “Words easy to utter within the safe confines of the shadows. My businesses succeed because I know what people want to do in secret. A duchess can have a bit of the rough with no one the wiser. A bastard can have a duchess. What can seem wonderful in the dark can have dire consequences in the light. You deserve better than a life hidden away from even those you care about.” Such as her sisters.
When his clothes were set to right, he reached out and cupped her chin, pressed his thumb to her lush lips. She hadn’t bothered to cover herself but just sat there like a nymph tempting the gods, and it took all his inner strength not to glide his hand over her silky skin. “Goodbye, sweetheart.”
While everything within him urged him to stay, he strode from the room leaving nothing behind except his heart.
Chapter 24
Selena sat on a wrought-iron bench in the garden, watching as Connie and Flo played a game of croquet, their squeals and laughter floating around them. Beside her, Alice was readingThrough the Looking-Glass.
