Page 199 of Midnights
I push off the door, my legs feeling unsteady as I make my way down the dark hallway. Every step feels heavier and the weight of the night presses in with each passing second. Only a few more steps.
I reach my room and shut the door behind me, my body moving on auto pilot as I lock it, but it’s not enough to make me feel safe. Nothing feels safe anymore. But I don’t want Rachel waking up and coming in here asking questions.
I let out a sharp breath and press my back against the door, then slide to the floor. My arms wrap around my knees, holding myself together even as the tremors rack through me. Everything hurts.
My dress clings to my skin, torn in some places. My arm throbs with every pulse of my heartbeat, and my insides feel like they’re on fire. I don’t think the cut is too deep, but it hurts like hell. Blood has already soaked into the fabric, and now that the adrenaline is wearing off, the pain is creeping in, sharp and insistent.
Exhaustion hits me full force. The fight, the chase, the way he disappeared. The lights. The screaming.
A violent shudder runs through me.
I don’t understand what happened. I don’t understand what’shappening,period.
I should be dead. That guy should’ve killed me. My mind replays the way he writhed in agony, the way the streetlights shattered, and the way his screams rang through the night like something had torn him apart from the inside.
The nausea returns, twisting my stomach into knots.
What the hell is happening to me?
I clutch my necklace, hoping for some kind of comfort, but it offers nothing. The ache in my chest builds and before I can stop it, the tears come. Not the quiet tears. A full, body-wracking, ugly kind. The kind that makes you feel like you’re coming apart at the seams.Which, right now, hurts like a bitch.
I press my hand against my face, trying to muffle the sobs, but they just keep coming, spilling over faster than I can control.
Pull yourself together.The words sound like something my grandfather would say.
A memory surfaces, and I can hear his voice. Patient, but unyielding.
“A fight isn’t just about strength, Raven. It’s about control. A warrior with no control is already dead.”
I exhale shakily, gripping onto the words like a lifeline. Control.
I force myself to move, and I push to my feet. My body feels too heavy, and my limbs protest, but I make my way to the bathroom, peeling off my dress, leaving a trail of my night behind me on the floor.
The moment I step into the shower, the steam surrounds me. The water is hot enough to scald my skin, and it stings as I step under the spray. But I don’t care. I watch the blood swirl down the drain as the pink tendrils twist through the water, and then vanish. Gone. As if none of it happened.
I wish my thoughts would go with it.
I press my forehead against the cool tile, letting the water run over me, washing away the sweat, the rain, the blood.The fear.
By the time I step out, I feel a little more like myself. Notfine,but functional. I grab a towel wrapping it around me as I rummage through the first aid kit under the sink.
I clean the cut with shaky hands, sucking in a sharp breath when the antiseptic burns like hell. I get the bandage wrapped snugly around my arm, covering the wound. It's a temporary fix, but it'll work. There’s nothing I can do about my ribs. The bruise already looks black and purple, and it takes up half my side. I just can't let Rachel see it.
I wipe the fog from the mirror as my own reflection stares back at me. My eyes are still red-rimmed with dark circles beneath them and I look like shit.
I let out a breath, forcing my shoulders to square. I’ll deal with this tomorrow. Right now, I just need to sleep.
I drag myself to bed, collapsing onto the mattress with a heavy sigh. The wind howls outside and I can still hear the storm still raging, but I focus on the steady rhythm of my breathing as I cry myself to sleep.
Chapter 32
Evermore
Raven
The air is heavy with the scent of rain and the ground beneath me is damp and spongy against my skin.
I roll onto my elbows to see that I’m in a forest.
