Page 284 of The Texas Sterling Collection
“Did Joey tell you he loved you before or after that?”
“After the letter arrived from my father.”
“So, you decided to push Joey away so he'd find a girlfriend?”
Felix nodded. “When he said we would both find a little filly, it made me realize I liked him too much. He’s my first guy friend, and I enjoy his company. But I don’t know how friends work. I assumed a friend lasted for life.”
“Sometimes yes, and sometimes no,” Grover said. “Some friends are friends because they do something together. Like sports, for example. When they stop doing sports together, they drift apart. Other friends are friends because they like the person, regardless of what they do. I think you and Joey fit into that second category. You two come from different backgrounds, but bonded like glued paper.”
Felix pondered. Yeah, he and Joey came from different backgrounds, but Joey eagerly showed him ranching, and he craved learning from Joey. “Pa Sterling, Joey and I come from different lives, but I thought we got along well. The letter from Father made me realize that, at the end of summer, I will lose more than Joey. I will lose the Sterlings.”
“Felix, you will never lose us. Mabel and I both like you a lot. She called you our third son. Perhaps it made you feel weird, but you made Joey happier than we’ve seen him since before Jacob left. So you, son, are important to us.”
Was he wrong about this whole thing? “Pa Sterling, did I mess up by pushing Joey away?”
“You’re asking the wrong person, Felix. The person you need to ask is Joey. But if he loves you like he told you, then yes, pushing him away hurt him.”
Felix pondered his actions. He wanted Joey to feel free to pursue a little filly if he wished to, but he didn’t want to hurt him. He thought Joey wanted to settle down and have kids, and if he made Joey hate him, Joey would get what he wanted. It never occurred to him that Joey might not like that little filly.
“And Felix, you might want to apologize to Mabel. She’s been worried about you and Joey, and your silent treatment made her worry more.”
Felix sighed and risked a glance at Grover. “I need to apologize to you, too. I didn’t mean for you to think I don’t like it here, and I didn’t mean to worry Ma Sterling. I only wanted to give Joey what he said he needed.”
“I think he needs you, Felix.”
Felix nodded. He needed Joey and wanted to return to how things were before the ‘little filly’ conversation. Regardless of whether they enjoyed only one summer together, pushing Joey away hurt them both. And Joey told him he loved him, and again Felix pushed him away. What a dope he'd been. “Do you have any idea where he is?”
Grover gigged Patches into a slow walk. “I hoped he said something to you, Felix. But at lunch, you said he didn’t. So, I have no idea where he went.”
Sparkle started with no urging from Felix, and they rode back to the barn in silence. After they unsaddled and curried the horses, they strolled toward the house. Grover pulled Felix into a hug. “Son, I bet your pa never hugged you or told you how much you meant to him. But Mabel and I, and Joey, love you and are glad you are here.”
Emotional tears pooled in Felix’s eyes as he buried his face in Grover’s neck and wrapped his arms around the gentle man who became his second father. “Thanks, Pa Sterling. Those words mean a lot to me.”
“Good.” Grover released the hug and put an arm around his shoulders. “Let's go eat supper.”
After washing up, Felix tapped Mabel on the shoulder. She turned, and he hugged her despite his unfamiliarity with the wholehuggingthing. “I’m so sorry, Ma Sterling. I didn’t mean to be so quiet and moody the last couple of weeks. I promise to do better by you and Pa Sterling.”
She returned his hug. “I’m glad, Felix.”
He took his seat at the table. “I hope Joey comes back soon. I need to apologize to him, too.”
Later that night, Felix knelt at the open window in his room, staring out at the night sky.“Where are you, Joey? Please come home so I can apologize and tell you I love you, too.”He decided he couldn’t wait for Joey to come home. He needed to find Joey.
Chapter Thirteen
Felix rose early the following day, dressed, and strolled through the kitchen for his usual morning trip to the outhouse. “Morning, Ma Sterling. Morning, Pa Sterling.” Felix headed out the back door. He missed greeting them each morning, and it felt right.
“Morning, Felix,” they said in unison.
Back inside and seated at the table, Mabel served up breakfast. “You’re in a fine mood this morning, Felix.”
Felix reached for a warm biscuit. “Pa Sterling and I talked yesterday, and I realized I upset Joey. I may be wrong about what Joey thought.”
“I appreciate you apologizing to me yesterday, Felix,” Mabel said. “And I’m glad you’re feeling better.”
Felix buttered his biscuit and lifted a forkful of the scrambled eggs Mabel put on his plate. After chewing and swallowing his first bite, he said, “Pa Sterling, I want to go out and find Joey.”
“I thought you didn’t know where he went,” Grover said.
