Page 28 of A Voice In Chains
Ryan sniggers before shoving me lightly to tell me I’m out of line. But I keep my grin in place like I’m not thinking about the way Arkin readjusts his bag for the second time. Like I don’t see how the cocky mask he wears at home is slipping. Now, he looks small. And I hate that I notice.
Amy joins us while I’m smirking at him, snuggling up to me and kissing me on the jaw.
He flicks his gaze to her, my friends, then me… I can tell he senses the dynamic shift. I’m the popular striker here at St. Conwyer College. And I hold a lot of power.
I tip my chin toward reception. “What are you waiting for? Fuck off.”
“Zach!” Amy scolds, but the laughter in her voice is unmistakable. She slides her hand up my chest and bites her lip to hold her smile back.
I hug her closer with my arm around her shoulder and grin at Arkin. “You don’t belong with us.”
His throat jumps on a swallow, and then he steps back to adjust his backpack for a third time before he shuffles up to Janice and jiggles his knee again like he’s nervous.
“You’re mean,” Amy says, slapping my chest playfully, but I can’t return her smile because now my stomach is in knots, and I’m struck with the sudden urge to run up to him and apologize. What am I doing? I’m not this cruel guy.
“That was cold,” Harrison says with an uncertain chuckle as they walk away.
I peer over my shoulder. Janice hands Arkin his paperwork and pops her gum again, unbothered. Like this moment means nothing. Like this whole thing isn’t getting under my skin like an itch I can’t scratch. And fuck do I want to scratch—I want to scratch until my skin splits open.
My heart almost jumps to my fucking throat when he glances over his shoulder and looks right at me. For a second, we watch each other.
It only lasts for a moment or two, but my pulse stutters before I shove it down, reminding myself that I don’t care.
Ishouldn’tcare.
Still, I don’t look away. Neither does he. Whatever thisthingis between us. Whatever this thing is that tightens my chest when he’s around needs to stop.
Fuck it.
I should walk away. Ihaveto walk away. But I’m locked in place until he turns back and nods at something Janice says.
Amy leads me away, talking my ear off as we round the corner, but I barely hear her because she sounds underwater.
Distant.
Muted.
And I’m drowning.
CHAPTER NINE
Arkin leaves me alone after that. Days pass. He doesn’t even look at me at home anymore, as if I’m invisible to him. I thought it was what I wanted, but now I’m checking my phone for messages and sneaking glances at him whenever we’re in the same room. I tell myself I feel this way because of the guilt that’s festered since I rejected him that first day at college.
Still, I avoid him because it’s easier than acknowledging that my heart skips a beat when he enters the room or how my chest tightens with anticipation.
I’m strutting down the bustling hallway between classes with my friends when I become aware of a ruckus ahead. Students step aside for us like they always do, and my heart explodes in my chest at the site of Arkin and Jones.
Jones is a stocky rugby player and a bully. I don’t know him that well because we run in different circles, but he’s known to be an arse. A guy who never left fucking high school.
He crowds Arkin against the wall, flashing a look that says he enjoys bigging himself up and being “the man.”
Arkin isn’t small by any means, but he looks it now, his sky-blue eyes scanning the gathered crowds until they lock on me.
I ignore him, swinging my arm around Amy. But my heart squeezes, and my jaw clenches. Eyes forward. Jones is a dick, but he isn’t my issue.
“Hey, isn’t that the charity case?” Ryan asks.
Let’s be real for a second - students are messed with every day. We’re not Samaritans. Seeing a guy hassled by Jones is nothing unusual.
