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For me, love doesn’t exist.

"They're sweet together." Gabriella's voice startles me.

She's materialized at my side, two steaming cups in her gloved hands. "I brought you coffee. Black, no sugar, just how you like it."

I tell myself it means nothing that she knows how I take my coffee.

"Thanks," I mutter, accepting the cup without meeting her eyes. "Your father?"

"With Leo. They're reminiscing about some Christmas party from thirty years ago." She sips her drink, watching Roman and Angelica. "Roman's a natural father."

I nod.

“I remember when he first married Emilia thinking what does she see in him? He was the scariest man I knew.” She laughs, but it’s not like that laugh before. And it’s not from something I said. “He’s a big teddy bear when it comes to his family.”

I nod again.

“I’m glad he found love again. I didn’t know Isabella well. Her mother always kept her away, but she’s sweet.”

“Her mother wanted her out of the life.” And it got her killed.

“It’s not easy for women.”

I glance down at her. “You do alright.”

She purses her lips at me. “I’m required to have a guardian. What other woman in the world needs to be guarded like she’s a petulant child?”

“One who betrays her family by talking to the Feds.”

She rolls her eyes at me.

“Uncle Marco!” Angelica and Roman skate by. “I’m beating Daddy!”

“You’re a winner,” I call out.

“Softy,” Gabriella says under her breath as she sips her coffee.

“Excuse me?”

Her grin is filled with amusement and I don’t like it. “You. Even you’re a softy around kids.” Her eyes narrow as she scrutinizes me. “You never wanted what Roman has?”

I scoff. "What I want is irrelevant."

"That's not an answer, Marco."

On the ice, Roman catches Angelica as she stumbles, setting her upright, worry in his eyes until she’s steady again.

What would my father have done?

Laughed if I’d fallen. Or maybe beaten me for embarrassing the family. After all, Calabresi men don't fall.

"I'm not built for it," I finally say. "Some men are meant to build families. Others are meant to protect them from a distance."

Gabriella's shoulder brushes mine, the contact sending heat through my body despite the winter chill. "That sounds lonely."

"It's necessary."

"Is it?" She turns to face me fully, her eyes searching mine. "Or are you afraid?”