Page 14 of Sinister Hearts
I laughed in disbelief. “Yeah right, he loved the eighteen-year-old me. We were kids. We were two completely different people back then. Who would want to date me anyways, with all the bullshit I’m dealing with? Plus, I don’t have the time, I’m a working single mom now.” I was trying to convince myself that there’s no way in hell Jax still had a “thing” for me.
“Honey, I may be naive at times, but I ain’t stupid. Everyone sees the way he still looks at you.” Avi said while closing her metal locker.
I couldn’t even deny it. I saw the man for five minutes after so many years and there was something lingering there between us, like a knotted thread I couldn’t cut no matter how hard I tried. I dismissed her comments. I didn’t want to give anyone in this town any indication that was ever happening again.
“I do have a question, though. What is up with this whole patched peacoat thing?” I asked Avi.
She seemed hesitant to answer. “Just a group of rebel cowboys thinking they’re some kind of superheroes at night.” Avi smirked it off. “They look shittier than they are, I promise, but I also wouldn’t want to be on their bad side either, if you’re catching my drift.” Avi grabbed her purse.
“I am not, explain.” I tried not to sound too curious.
“Let’s just say a couple years ago, I heard a rumor that one of the brothers got into a bad brawl with some head honcho, and nearly beat him to death. He was a bad man, in a lot of shady businesses. He was a real piece of shit. He had it coming honestly.”
“What the fuck,” I accidentally said out loud.
“Yeah, it was loco. We don’t need weirdos like that in our small town anyway.”
I nodded my head in agreement.
“Your cousins never told you?” Avi looked at me, curious.
“Told me what?” Confusion overtook me, and Avi suddenly became quiet.
“About what happened?”
Billy interrupted us before I could respond, walking in with his board. “Alright, ladies, make sure you get that beauty sleep tonight. We have a big company party tomorrow night, don’t disappoint me.” The girls raved in the locker room, and we tried to pick up from where we left off.
“So they’re a group of vigilantes?”
Avi smirked. “You’re hilarious, Faye.”
Except, I was so fucking serious. I had so many more questions. It had been five years, and while this small town may not have changed, Jaxon definitely did.
Changing the subject, “Anyways, you expect me to believe an old flame has a thing for me after all these years? You’re wild.” I laughed. “Plus, did you see that cochina (nasty girl) all over him tonight, I could see the drool from the bar.” Avi and I laughed, while I began packing my stuff in my bag.
“Don’t pay too much attention to those buckle bunnies, they would fuck a cow with a ten-incher.”
“That’s so disgusting, Avi!” I gagged exaggeratingly.
“Well, it’s true, trust me. Cindy has been after Jax since high school. But he refuses to give commitment a second thought.” She gawked.
“Why is that? She’s a cute girl,” I asked, genuinely curious.
“Oh, I don’t know, maybe because he’s still in love with his spicy, brunette, Latina ex lover?” Avi mocked, looking at me like I had five heads.
“Oh my god, stop with this!” I couldn’t even entertain this thought.
“Faye, have you seen yourself?” Avi turned to me.
“Yeah, and I wish I didn’t, I’m gross right now.” I tried to make a joke at my own expense.
She grabbed me and turned me toward the mirror, standing firm behind me.
“You’re beautiful, always have been. Love the skin you’re in.” A somber look spread across her face. “The Faye I used to know knocked men on their asses with just a glance. That girl is still in there. You just have to find her,” Avi encouraged, looking at me through the mirror. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Miss Thing.”
She left, leaving me gazing at my reflection. Was that girl really still in there? Was I really capable of being loved with all my fresh wounds and ruptured soul?
During the drive home I seemed to be stuck replaying the interaction with Jax from earlier. The way his fingertips brushed my hand, the way we looked at each other on contact. I kept going over the interaction, convincing myself the energy I felt between us was just left over feelings, like a salad after a hefty lasagna. Jax had always been a flirt and a “bad boy”. The same concoction that got me hurt by him in the first place. The fact that I was even thinking about this was ridiculous.
