Page 141 of I Replaced His Husband
So I got to work.
I had to be quiet and careful, though weaving a nest isn’t exactly the noisiest thing in the world.
While he slept, I worked… and worked, my soul humming with the ancient call of every omega who ever built a nest: an instinct born from love, care, and the need to nurture.
I infused it with my pheromones from the glands on my wrists, giving it a scent meant to soothe, to deepen the feeling of closeness and safety.
Within two hours, a soft but stable wall of blankets and pillows had risen around Rain, the ones he’d brought me, now woven together with his sweaters and hoodies.
When it was finally done, I just stood there, feeling strangely proud. It was the best nest I’d ever made, representing the beginning of my real adulthood, my true maturity as an omega.
Rain looked perfect lying there at its center…
Surrounded by… me. I wanted to give back, in my own way, the emotional safety he gave me every day.
My other hand slid down to my belly. I could feel a subtle vibration of life, the heartbeat of my child. Something new was on the horizon.
I was going to be a dad. And Rain would be the father of my child.
For the first time, I felt completely ready. I wasn’t alone;we were a team. No more panicking, no more feeling like I wasn’t stable enough. I felt grounded.
I slowly walked to the window, looking out over the garden. Even though this was our first night back here, I didn’t feel like a stranger. I’d grown up in this house, lived here with my parents.
But I hadn’t wanted to come back for years after they died.
Too many ghosts.
Staring at the wide patio, memories came flooding back: afternoons with my parents, who, like Maurice, were my safe space. My whole world. Their deaths in a plane crash were among the hardest things I’d ever gone through. I couldn’t really process them at the time. My brothers and Maurice became my everything. I clung to them, knowing how quickly life could be taken away.
They left the whole company to twenty-three-year-old Marco. I was just starting college. I couldn’t imagine coming back to this house then, afraid the painful memories would crush me.
So when Maurice proposed, I said yes without even thinking about it. I had lost one anchor, and he offered me another. Being engaged while still in college gave me something to hold onto. It felt like a new pillar in my life. We got married the summer after I graduated.
Now, with my eyes closed, that time felt so distant. Back then, it felt huge. But now, it was just one of many memories, no longer the defining one.
I’d been drifting through my life, fixated on finding the next safe place, the next safe bubble, too afraid to look at what was in between.
Turning slowly, I looked at Rain.
How wrong I was to assume things would always be the same, that anything could be absolutely certain, that nothing random could happen. My parents died, and… Maurice died. I could never have guaranteed 100% safety and absolute peace. It was a harsh conclusion, but that's not what life was about. Maybe that was even the essence of it, our fragility?
Should I start to appreciate more the fleeting moments? The space in between?
Glancing at my nest again, I smiled. Inside, Rain slept, unaware of my nightly musings.
It was clear to me now why omegas build nests. They create small areas of safety because only small areas of life can truly be protected.
Nobody can control whether a plane malfunctions and crashes, if a car's brakes fail, or if three lunatics decide to invade somebody's home.
The external world is beyond our control.
Curiously, Rain’s presence in my life made me realize new things. He helped me see that I also had strength. I mattered; I was capable of doing things that influenced the course of the last two attacks we faced together. Maybe that was the reason I stopped being so afraid of becoming a parent?
Though we couldn't control everything, perhaps we could still live happily with Rain, in our uncharted land, our beautiful and chaotic terra incognita.
Rain wasn’t just my new bodyguard, Maurice’s replacement. Beingtogetherwas our strength.
Yes,we were a team!Emphasis on that, again.
