Page 11 of I Replaced His Husband
With all this chaos in my head, with all this rage, this gloom and doom I kept spiraling into?
My poor son would have a mentally unstable, self-loathing dad. A nervous wreck.
How long was I planning to even cling to my miserable mood instead of working on healing?
Some of how I felt was my own damn doing, sure.
Though the rest? That was Fate. And Fate… sucked.
It took Maurice from me, motherfucker.
Was it going to give meanythingback?
RAIN
Storming out of the building felt like the only sane option; I didn’t want to talk to anyone right then. I ended up on a wide terrace that overlooked a beautifully kept garden. Down below, through a scattering of birch trees, I caught glimpses of a forest lake. The brothers lived in a quiet little town called White Cliffs, a well-known tourist spot famous for its scenic coastline, peaceful woods, and rolling hills stretching out in every direction.
I didn’t know where to go at first, but eventually I wandered toward the beach, drawn to a secluded patch of sand. I sat down on a fallen tree trunk that jutted partway into the water, hoping to clear my head for a few minutes. It felt like my brain had turned into a buzzing beehive; I couldn’t get a single thought to settle.
After about ten minutes of deep breathing and wrestling with my thoughts, I saw Adam walking toward me with a frazzled look on his face. He hesitated a moment, then sat beside me on the log. For a while, we just stared at the lake’s silver surface in silence.
"Rain, I hope you haven’t changed your mind," he said softly. "Kay really needs you. I know he’s sorry for how it went down. He just didn’t want to let himself feel too good, you know? He was scared his body betrayed him."
I glanced at him but didn’t answer. It was way too soon for me to process everything I’d just been through in Kay’s room, and not for just one reason.
Adam turned to study my face. "Kay fell for Maurice hard. Love at first sight. They were completely wrapped up in each other, almost annoyingly so. They were high school sweethearts, and High Mates, which only made everything more intense. He’s still in shock from the accident. Please try to bear with him. I know he needs an alpha near him. His body’s craving you. And it sounds like things went exceptionally well, from what we overheard…" He gave a sheepish laugh.
"Still, I heard ‘get out’ from him," I said, shrugging.
"Please don't take it personally, Rain. I know it's a lot to ask."
"Adam, I get it. At least I try to. I’m not in any position to make demands or expect him to change his ways. That’d be entitled. He lost his husband; his grief is understandable. I was just… thrown by the whole thing. It hit harder than I expected."
We lapsed into silence. My eyes stayed fixed on the far side of the lake.
Adam rubbed his chin. "The whole thing, you mean the sex part? Was it too much?"
I frowned, trying to find the right words. After a moment, I admitted something. "It’s not just that. I’ve never done a one-night stand before. I’ve always been in long-term relationships. I like cuddling after sex; I need that intimacy. It matters to me. Having to just go through the motions and then leave… it was harder than I thought. I guess I was under the wrong impression I could go without it, but it turns out I can’t."
Adam let out a sigh. "That’s exactly what Marco warned me about when I said I was gonna reach out to you."
"Yeah? Well, I guess his instincts were spot-on. And I’ll own my part in this. I got caught up in the idea of helping out. Kay’s attractive, no doubt about it, and that didn’t help my judgment. So I didn’t come here with a clear picture of the situation. I read him all wrong."
"That sounded… serious. What exactly does that mean?"
"I mean, first of all, I expected him to be sad or withdrawn, but not… angry and aggressive."
Adam watched a group of tiny brown fish darting through the shallows.
"So, he wasn’t what you expected. Does that mean you’re backing out?"
My face must’ve given something away, because Adam tilted his head, and I felt my cheeks go warm.
"No, Adam. I’m not walking out on you guys in the middle of this. I keep my word. And I don’t expect Kay to be super friendly. I just don’t want to be treated like a piece of meat, kicked out and literally pushed."
"I totally get that. And to be fair to him, Kay actually asked me to warn you about his attitude when we talked on the phone the first time, but I probably didn’t do a great job. I was afraid you wouldn’t come if I was too upfront about his message. So… yeah. My bad."
I raised my eyebrows. "So you sugar-coated it?"
