Page 33 of My Brother's Keeper
I made my way down the steps, snatched my keys, and stormed outside.
Another swig.
I dropped the empty bottle on the ground as I put the helmet on my head. I started my bike and took off. I sped through the streets until I reached her crib. The front desk worker stared at me curiously, but I didn’t give a fuck. I grumbled as I passed by the desk to the elevator. I squinted my eyes as my vision began to blur. When I entered the elevator, I hit the floor I needed. As the elevator ascended, I staggered, facing the mirror, Mali versus Mison.
“Fuck, you looking at,huh!” I shouted.
It was me versus me.
“You’re a drunk just like your father.”
“No!Nigga that’s you!” I clapped back.
The version of me I saw in the mirror wasn’t the same. My head turned slightly to the side.Was this nigga laughing at me?
“Fuck you! You're not real!” I shouted as my hands slammed against the mirror.
“I am. I’m you, the ugly version. I’m the nigga you created. The one that didn’t save his mother. The one that doesn’t give a fuck about himself or his brothers, the nigga that’s deceiving a woman he’s been loving for years. I’m the nigga with no heart. I’m denial, depression, anxiety, and failure. Nigga I’m you!”
Ding!
What the fuck was happening to me? I staggered down the hall as my body bounced from wall to wall. I tried to focus my eyes when I saw some nigga coming out of her place. “What the fuck?” I mumbled.
I pulled my gun from behind me and rushed down the hall. “Nigga why the fuck are you coming from her crib?”
One nigga turned into two, and I lost it. Before I knew it, my pistol was bashing that nigga’s head in, over and over.
“Mison!”I heard Symphony shout.
I turned and pointed at her. “Take yo ass back inside.”
I went back to work on his ass until the nigga stopped moving. I stood over his body as I turned toward Symphony’s door. “You fucking lied to me! You said you were going to see your pops, and you're in here with another nigga!”
She shoved me. “Are you out of your fucking mind! He was here fixing something. Mison, you have a problem. You think I don’t know, but I do! Nigga you better leave now!” she shouted.
I glanced back at the guy who was groaning. I had fucked up. The words of Diamond replayed in my head. On a good drinking day, no telling what you will do.I felt sick, and I needed to get the fuck out of here. I rushed back down the hall. This time, I took the stairs because I didn’t have it in me to face the man Ihad become. As soon as I got out of the building, I gagged and then threw up.
I was losing my fucking mind. I hopped on my bike and took off. I needed someone, and there was only one person I knew who would actually listen.
ALYSE
The nerves that coursed through me made my legs shake a little. My telling him I was ready to have sex was something I had been sitting on for a while. Could I have waited? Yes, did I want to? No. Jalen was risky, and I wanted to immerse myself in him fully. He and I had something special, something that I knew I wouldn’t find anywhere else. He made me feel safe, he listened, and cared about the things I was into.
When he lay me on the bed, my breathing picked up.
If you want me to stop, tell me, ok?
I nodded. His hand slowly grazed my legs until he reached the brim of my shorts. He gripped them and slowly pulled them off. The first thing I wanted to do was put my hand over my center, but I didn’t. My stomach caved in as he came out of his shirt. I wasn’t expecting all the tattoos, but they were nice to look at. The J pendant hung slightly, allowing me to see a girl’s name on his chest. The thought of asking crossed my mind, but I decided against it. He must have noticed I had become fixated on it because he glanced down, then back at me.
It's my mother’s name. Joyce.You have nothing to worry about.There is no one else but you. Now let me take care of you.He winked.
I scooted back on the bed. “I don’t know what to do.”
He grinned sexily.Sex is like dancing. You and I are about to dance, baby.
With that, he came out of his pants, and my eyes damn near popped out of my head. This was the first time, other than pictures, that I had seen a black dick in person. The only other time I saw dick was back in high school when this boy Chad showed me in class, and it was pink. I swallowed deeply as he stepped forward, and I scooted back.
Alyse, relax. It’s just dick, it doesn’t bite, it pleases.He signed before he gripped it in his hand, rubbing the head.
