***
The drive wasn’t long from my house to my destination. When I pulled up in the driveway, I saw his car, so I knew he was home. I got out, slammed my car door, and banged on his front door. It took a minute before I heard London’s ashy bark and the locks click. When the door opened, my eyes widened. “Hey, Symphony,” Indigo smiled.
I had forgotten that she was still here. “Hey, girl, is Bop here?”
She backed up to let me inside. I glanced over her as she wore an oversized shirt, and her hair was all over the place. She pulled her eyes away like she didn’t want anyone to know that she and Bop had just finished fucking. I couldn’t care less about what they were doing and more about this Kareem issue.
Before my lips could sayGirl, pleasethe sound of Bop echoed in the foyer. “What are you doing here?”
I turned to see him coming down the stairs without a shirt. I had forgotten that underneath all those suits he wore, he was covered in tattoos. Bishop was one of those niggas that would surprise you. Hood nigga with expensive taste and debonair demeanor. Once he was at the bottom of the steps, he glanced at me curiously, then at Indigo. “Come on, Lulu, let’s eat, Mommy,” she said to London as she walked into the kitchen with London prancing behind her like she understood.
As soon as they disappeared beyond the walls, I turned to Bishop, “I want you to take me to see Kareem!” I spat.
Bishop flicked his nose as something in his eyes changed. “I can’t.”
My head swung. “What do you mean you can’t? But you can take in the nigga’s brother?”
He ran his hand over the back of his neck. I’ve been knowing Bop long enough to know something I didn’t want to hear was about to come out of his mouth. He rubbed his hands together as he lifted his head slowly. “Kareem is out. I-I did it for Keith.”
I felt fucking sick. I didn’t know if I wanted to punch Bop in his face, cry because I knew he didn’t have bad intentions doing what he did, or be afraid because I didn’t know if Kareem would come back to finish the job. When I glanced back up at him, I could see the guilt in his eyes. I had nothing to say because in this moment, I felt betrayed by my best fucking friend.
PEANUT
I decided to link up with my brother while I waited for Alyse to finish at practice. The thought of her creating a safe space for me was part of why I liked her. If it were left up to me, I would continue to move the way I had been, but I knew that to make things work, sometimes you had to make sacrifices. I had done it so many times in the past for my brothers, and it went unappreciated, but doing it for someone who seemed to care made the shit worth doing.
I was accepted to college, but with Zay already off to school, who would be around to care for Mison? Me. I’m not sure how I would have managed school if I had been non-verbal, but my brother's well-being was more important to me. The thing was, he had a problem that he was in denial about. If I had known he was going to keep moving as if we were the problem, maybe my decision about school would have been different.
I pulled back up to the campus and strolled through it like I was one of the students; the feeling of what-ifs simmered through me. I envied the lifestyle. Only a few people were walking on campus when I spotted Zay walking backward, talking to someone, spinning a ball on his finger.
As he tried turning around, a girl who was on her phone bumped into him. It looked like they were going back and forth, but to be sure nothing popped off, I ran over toward him. “Fuck you!All you athletes think y’all run something but don’t run shit but your mouth,” she snapped at him.
He tried handing her a book that fell, and she snatched it out of his hand. “You should be a little nicer to a nigga that apologizes,” he snapped back.
She stared up at him and snarled. Zay, standing next to her, was like Shaq standing next to anybody. Shorty was cute as hell, but she wasn’t Zay’s type. He usually didn’t go for the poster girls; instead, he went for ones who looked like nerds. However, the way he stared at her as she walked off said otherwise.
Are you going to stare at her or get her number?
He laughed.Nah, she ain’t my type, but just in case I did get her name, Phoebe.he signed as he held up a paper with her name on it.
I shook my head because my brother was crazy. I’m sure he got women daily based on his popularity alone.
What are you doing here?He asked.
I came to see a Shorty. Alyse, she’s—
He cut me off.I know who she is. She’s one of the rich ones.She dances with Blue Reign.
Yeah. Anyway, I came to chill with you for a bit. Have you talked to Mison?
His face changed, and I knew it meant he didn’t. We walked the campus until we got to where he practiced. Zay disappeared into the locker room, leaving me standing in the practice facility. The shit was cold. The money spent on this building alone could have been spread across the university to give other parts of the school some life, but shit who was I? I didn’t want to sit around and watch the nigga shoot layups, so I decided to explore the campus.
My eyes landed on Prince Quad. I laughed because the first people I thought about were the Prince family. As I made my way further into campus, I realized the names were after some of the rich families in Lake Hill, down to Bean’s last name.
When I noticed I was now at the media building, I stepped inside. I eased down the hall, looking into each room until I spotted Beans, headphones on, sitting alongside Paige. Their mouths were moving, but I couldn’t really hear them beyond theglass. I pulled out my phone and logged onto the College radio app to catch their live podcast.
“So, you're telling me you wouldn’t sacrifice anything for love? For your family?” Paige asked as she looked at him.
Beans leaned forward, barely tilting the mic toward his lips. “I mean—”