Page 18 of Dark Bratva Christmas
“Mmm...” I mumble, shutting my eyes and letting the blackness take over. It feels great, satisfying…
But it ends. And the guilt I was fighting comes right back.
Matysh pulls himself out of me, and then lets out a huff.
Like he’s…disappointed.
My stomach knots up as I gather the courage to look at him. Matysh looks me in the eyes and the desire is gone. The same cold look reappears, and I realize whatever I saw earlier—thewant—was fleeting.
Him going easy on me was born from a promise to Mikhail, nothing else.
And just like that, he slips into his pants and grabs his shirt, nodding to me without saying a word, before leaving me alone in my room.
I toss my legs over the side of the bed to go clean up, stopping when I see the blood stains on the sheets. Immediately, I reach for them, frantically ripping them off the bed in a hurried mess. My stomach churns as I pile them into the corner.
Right next to my wedding dress.
I just lost my fucking virginity to Matysh Volkov, the fucking devil brother of Mikhail.
Oh, and my husband.
My heart breaks and I can’t stop the tears that fall from my eyes.
***
I don't know what exactly I was expecting when I was handed off to marry Matysh, but it wasn't this. I never got the chance to know my mother before she died, but I did know that she was only a trophy. My father married her because she had status in the city, a wealthy socialite’s daughter with business connections back in Russia. She was beautiful…
And easy to control.
I can’t help but wonder if that’s what Matysh thought he was getting from me—and then was sorely disappointed, so now I’mhere.
Locked away in a room with no access to the outside world like some kind of concubine.
It's been three weeks since Matysh and I...consummatedour marriage. I haven't seen him since. The only other person I've interacted with is Helena when she's brought me food and water.
“And how are you feeling today?” Helena always asks as she turns down my bed, fluffing my pillows while staring at me with a slightly less terrified smile. “Any signs?”
“I think it's too early to tell if I'm pregnant,” I raise my brow. “You can stop asking and just get me a pregnancy test. It might be less awkward.” My tone is sharp, but she stopped wincing at me a long time ago.
Clearly, I’m losing my edge.
I groan as I flop back on my pillow. If I had my phone or a computer, or any other access to Google, I would definitely be trying to figure out how long it takes to find out if you're pregnant. The odds of getting pregnant the first time you have sex are probably pretty slim.
There’s no way I’d get that lucky to never have to fuck that monster again.
But still, the idea of Matysh having to come back in my room sends a small jolt of excitement through me that I immediately feel guilty about.What the hell is wrong with me?
I'm forced to marry the brother of my now late husband, and there's a part of me thatwantshim. That’s fucking repulsive.
Matysh has spared me no warmth since our wedding night, and yet I’ve spent countless hours of my three-week-long imprisonment wishing he’d come back to my room and fuck me again.
Just because the sex felt good doesn't mean I have to stop hating him, I say to myself as I jump from the bed and start to pace.I’m going insane. It’s from being locked in this goddamn room.
I'm constantly spiraling, worrying about forgetting Mikhail too soon. I truly loved him.
There I go again, using the past tense. Ilovehim.
The door opens and I look up, realizing I'm a little disappointed to see that it's Helena again and not Matysh. She has some fresh laundry in hand as well as a small grocery bag with some essential items to restock in the room.
