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“Yeah,” I replied, equally as uncomfortable. “Is that okay?”
“Sure. Wanna just head up to Mocha Loco?”
“That sounds good.”
It was a little awkward, but I stood up with a smile and walked out of the bar. I could hear Seneca’s bootsteps behind me, so I continued out and got on my bike. There was a gentle tap on my back as Seneca passed me to get on her bike and she threw me a smile, which I took to meanrelax. For sure, it was me making things so tense, so I dropped my shoulders, took a deep breath, and smiled back, then we both started up our bikes with a pair of loud roars and made our way down the street to one of Hoppa’s local coffee shops, Mocha Loco.
The shop was still pretty empty inside given how early in the day it was, so it wasn’t difficult to find a table. I grabbed one near the door and prepared to ask Seneca what she wanted, but she set a hand on my shoulder and said, “What would you like?”
“Just a regular latté with an extra shot, please,” I replied.
She nodded. “Got it. I’ll be back.”
Sitting down at the table, I tried to organize my thoughts while I waited for Seneca. I didn’t want to immediately go into asking for help regarding Celia because I didn’t want it to seem like I had no interest outside of personal gain. My best friend skated into my mind, and I smiled, wondering if she would talk to me about him if I asked. I was dangerously curious, and it could be a nice way to just get to know her better.
Seneca came back with the coffees and sat across from me, setting my latte down in front of me as she went. “Thanks,” I said. “Round two is on me.”
“Oh?” Seneca replied in a light tone. “I gettwocoffees with you? I’m lucky.”
“Well, I don’t know that I’d call it lucky, but sure, let’s go with that,” I replied. “Really, I feel lucky that you’d be willing to stay here for two coffees.”
“I mean, it’s not every day that Hoppa’s hardass invites people out for coffee,” Seneca said. “I wasn’t about to throw away the chance.”
“Thanks, and that’s a great segue into what I wanted to discuss first, which is a heartfelt apology. I know we’ve kind of been butting heads ever since you came on as a prospect and I also know that a lot of that is due to my unique relationship with women. It shouldn’t have been on every woman I met to bear the issues that I faced in the past, and if you hadn’t come along, I may not have realized that. So I’m sorry and also, thank you.”
“I just call it like I see it,” she said. “I guess it was also a little frustrating because it seemed like you were really cool and then when I heard the rumor, I was really disappointed. Call me a dreamer, but I wanted to kind of snap you out of it, if nothing else.”
“Well, you did. I mean, dating Celia has helped a lot, too, but that would have fizzled out entirely after the first time she ghosted me if you hadn’t gotten real with me. She’s amazing and I wouldn’t be with her if it wasn’t for you.” I let out a snicker, only realizing as I said it how true it was. “Again, thanks.”
“You’re welcome. I’m glad my being a blunt asshole could benefit you.”
“Blunt assholery is something we have in common,” I replied.
She laughed. “So I’ve noticed.”
“I’m sorry, too, that you didn’t get to meet Tess and vice versa. She would have loved you, I think. Maybe she’ll come back one day, and you’ll get your chance.”
“That confident that I’ll become a member, huh?” she asked.
“If I have anything to do with it, yeah, and it has nothing to do with my making amends with women, and everything to do with the fact that you’re badass and we’d be lucky to have you.”
“If you don’t mind my asking, why the problems with women? What’d they do?” she asked.
“It all started with my mom. She was abusive when I was a child. She killed my dad.”
Seneca was mid-drink in her coffee and nearly choked on it when I said the latter half of the statement. “Shekilledyour dad?”
“Yeah. She was super abusive toward him, but he just took it all in his stride so long as it was him and not me, but then one day it turned on me. He tried to take me and escape into the night and she killed him. The police were called, but she claimed it was self-defense and they just believed her. Even though I said it wasn’t. Even though I said she used to hit my dad, they said it was different because she was a woman. The judge was female, and the cop that reported to the scene was female, too, and really laid it on thick in my mom’s defense. Said I was crying for my mom when my dad was trying to take me away and a bunch of other stuff that just wasn’t true. They sent me back with my mom and she beat the hell out of me for an additional four years until a teacher at my school finally noticed and called someone. They pulled me out of her house and put me with my foster dad.”
“Wow,” Seneca said. “I…” Her cheeks puffed up as she blew air out. “I would have trust issues, too. Just in general.”
“To be fair, Idohave your general, run-of-the-mill trauma-induced trust issues, but women just always put me in the mindset of my mom. It wasn’t fair, I admit that.” I shook my head. “That’s probably also why I have no idea what I’m doing when it comes to women.”
“Hitting another rough patch with Celia?”
“Not so much a rough patch as a long, flat path and I’m not really sure where the pitfalls are,” I replied. “She ghosted me a bunch right there in the beginning, but we’ve been fine for a couple of months now, I just feel like I don’t know if I’m still grasping at straws, expecting her not to bounce again.”
Seneca took a sip of her coffee. “Do you get the sense that she will?”
