Page 37 of A Kingdom of Death & Darkness
Because I love you.
I swallow hard at the surprising thought that isn’t spoken out loud.
Was that my emotion . . . or Carvers?
My heartbeat thunders in my ears but the moment she speaks, a calm follows the sound of her gentle voice.
She lets out a shaky breath. “Thank you.”
I release her slowly and step back. “Let’s hope the Princeling has as much grace as I do.” I gesture toward the door he disappeared through. “Go on. I’m sure you’re eager to ease his pain.”
She shakes her head and smiles at me. “You’re something else, you know that?”
I nod and flash her a teasing grin. “Yes. I know I’m one of a kind.” My eyes flicker toward the door where I know the Blood Prince waits beyond. “Be safe.”
And then she walks away.
TWENTY-FOUR
Crymson
I’ll never get usedto the glaring difference between the Blood Lands and the Fae Kingdom when I step outside the door to look for Christian. Where the Blood Lands is all burning ash and smoky skies, the Fae Kingdom is bright with sunshine and greenery. I can smell the salty ocean in the distance. While it’s overcast right now because of the rain, it’s still beautiful. I’m able to take a deep breath when I walk outside and not feel suffocated here. That is worth its weight in gold alone.
At first, as I walk through the gardens around the castle, I don’t see him. It takes me a while of peeking around corners and looking across the grounds to find him sitting on a bench alongside a large fountain. Someone had lovingly sculpted a scene of thorns curling around and up the base, where a woman stands with her arm outstretched. The thorns kiss her feet, climb up her legs, but don’t mar her skin. Christian sits beneath it, looking out across the field of wildflowers despitethe light sprinkling of rain, probably not even understanding the profoundness of where he sits.
I know he hears my approach. I’m not light-footed, and he has the senses of a predator, but he doesn’t move as I step forward and take a seat beside him on the small perch.
“Do you know who the statue is?” I ask, looking at him.
He glances at me and then looks over his shoulder up at the brass woman, his eyes perusing the features.
He’s silent for a long moment as he studies every inch.
“It’s her, isn’t it?” he finally whispers.
“Thorn told me about it once,” I say. “Of course, I didn’t know it was also your mother at the time.”
He doesn’t respond to my words. Instead, he turns back to the scenery before us and stares out at it like he’s lost in the heavy clouds. At least the rain has stopped. Kind of. Though I’d have come out here to be with him even if it was a downpour.
Christian saved me that night in his father’s kingdom. He gave away a pretty little pet that belonged to a ruthless man. Despite wanting to keep her. He truly did save me in his own messed-up way.
I just wish he’d let me save him right back sometimes.
He looks over at me with that cold contemplation he wears so well. “You look better,” he admits, almost begrudgingly. “Happier.”
I nod and stretch out my pale legs. I’m pretty sure I weigh more now than I have in my entire life, and all that’s happened is I look normal instead of gaunt.
“It’s amazing what’ll happen when you eat like you’re supposed to,” I tease. He doesn’t respond, no emotion in his eyes, and I sigh. “Look, we keep dancing around this thing between us. I’ve made it clear what I think of you.”
“And I haven’t?” he asks, raising his brow and peering at me from the corner of his eye.
“Not really,” I grumble. “You have this way of making me feel like I’m a pet rather than someone you care about.”
He turns more fully in his seat toward me. His eyes trace my face, taking in the emotion I know I’m wearing across my expression. Unlike Christian, I haven’t mastered the cold and calculated look. I don’t think I ever will. For now, I’ll keep trying.
“Does the Thorn King make you feel like that?” he asks on a low empty whisper.
For fuck’s sake. Here we go, I think as I fold my hands in my lap to keep from touching him. I really, really want to touch him. But it feels like it’ll cheapen this moment when I’m trying to tell him how I feel, to tell him that I don’t want to just be a pet. He came here for a reason, and hopefully, that reason is me, but in this world of blood kings and terrible monsters, there could be any manner of reasons he’s here.
