Page 74 of Counterpoint
A moment later, Ray crouched at his feet, a bottle of water in his hand, which he offered to Dom. “Hey, there’s no one here who doesn’t love you.”
Dom hiccupped a laugh, the tears dried-up but his body still shaking and hot-cold. “I know. It’s—nothing.”
Ray sat on the floor and Dom met his gaze. “Dom, we’ve known each other since we were fourteen. This ain’t nothing.”
Rather than reply, Dom cracked open the water bottle and drank. Mish was at his back, Ray at his front. That left one other bandmate. “Zav, where are you?”
“Here.” He was over on Dom’s left, leaning against a nearby table that held more water and some snacks. “Didn’t know what help I could be.”
“I used to get panic attacks before concerts, when we started playing live. Even when I was dressed as Domino, I’d need about an hour to get myself into a good enough space to step out onstage. I was always worried someone would find me out and realize I wasn’t the rocker people thought.” Not the kick-ass guitarist.
Zavier pushed off the table. “You’re an incredibly talented musician, Dom.” He came and stood near Ray. “And I don’t say that lightly.”
No, he didn’t. Zavier was honest almost to a fault when it came to music and whether something worked and sounded good. He’d even call Ray out if songs weren’t coming together right.
“I know. It’s...not a lack of confidence.”
“It’s a change in your life,” Ray said, almost to himself.
Zavier looked thoughtful.
“That boy toy of yours giving you trouble?” Mish rubbed Dom’s shoulders, and man, that felt good.
He took another draw of water. “Just the opposite.” He paused. “And he’s like...nine years older? Not exactly a boy toy.”
Ray’s eyebrows shot up. “So it’s serious?”
Zavier huffed. “It’s been serious since day one, I think.”
Interesting how embarrassment could pull him out of panic. This was the kind of stuff he knew, was used to. Loved about his bandmates. He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Look, I’m feeling better. Maybe we should practice?”
“Have you told him?” Zavier’s question rammed a spike of terror right back into Dom’s soul. He struggled to shrug it off, blinking a few times.
“Zav!” Ray looked up at his husband, then back to Dom. “Tell him what?”
“About the band,” Dom said.
That got him a look of confusion. Then Ray kicked his foot and his voice pitched high. “Youstillhaven’t told him about the band?”
“I—No. I mean, if it turned out to be a fling, I didn’t want him to run off and tell anyone.”
Mish patted his shoulders again. “He that kinda guy?”
“No.”
Zavier shifted, and Dom looked up at him. “I suspect even if you parted ways, he’d keep your secrets, Dom.” The way Zavier said that made Ray look up again.
Oh yeah, Ray was gonna put two and two together and figure out what Dom had already figured out about him and Zav—there was more going on than just sex. There was submission and domination and giving yourself over to someone you needed to care for you.
And for Dom, at least, there was bone-deep love, too.
Zavier was right, though. “Yeah, I know he would. And yeah, I know I need to tell him. It’s just—” Dom waved his hand. “Old fears.”
That he wasn’t good enough. That he’d never be good enough. He could hide that from the others by being Domino, but he could never hide from himself.
Zavier held his gaze. “Tell him, Dom. Trust is an important thing.”
Ray’s cheeks reddened. “Oh shit. You—” He caught himself. “We probably should get to practicing.”
