Page 58 of Slots & Sticks
“Please. That’s barely saving you at this point. Is there a reason you haven’t asked her yet?”
“Only about a million.”
“One million reasons?” George sips his beer. “Let’s hear ‘em.”
When I was a kid, I felt like I had to blend in to be accepted. That hasn’t changed, but pretending that my brain is somewhat linear has gotten easier with time. George is one of the few people who gets access to the full brunt of my tendency to overthink things.
“Here goes.” I suck in some air before letting it all out in a rush. “I like Dot a lot, but what if this is a bad time? Her emotions are all over the place, and she’s got her hands full with everything. I don’t want to upset her, but what if I shoot my shot now and I put her on the spot? Then she might decide that she doesn’t want me around, and I won’t get to see her at all. Or what if sheisinto me, but in a casual way? Like a rebound for non-romantic emotional upheaval. It’s shit timing, Geo.”
George sips his beer. “Is that all? Because that wasn’t anywhere close to a million.”
“It is if it plays through my head on loop.” I don’t tell George that the only time my thought spiral calms down is when I’m actively kissing Dot. No doubt he’d say that kissing is a sure signthat she’s interested, but I’m not convinced that she’s looking for anything serious right now.
“Look.” George sets his beer aside and clasps his hands in front of him. “I don’t know Dot, but I know you. You’ve liked her for ages. I get why the timing is bad, but the timing isalwaysgoing to be bad by your reckoning. Asking her out is a risk, and in my humble opinion, it’s one you should have taken years ago. Right now, she’s in distress. Later, she’ll be busy taking care of her dad. And then getting a new job. And one of these days, she’s going to meet someone who likes her enough to make a move, and you’ll be left alone. You get what I’m saying?”
“I get it,” I mumble.
“Great.” George claps his hands. “And with that, I’m out. I have a show later, and since you refuse to be the menace to society that I had once hoped, I need to scrounge up some other material.”
When the door clicks shut, Soot crawls back onto my chest. “Yeah,” I whisper. “Timing sucks. But she’s mine to wait for.”
* * *
I’ve been apart from Dot for less than twenty-four hours, and it’s occurred to me that my separation anxiety is almost as bad as Skinbad’s. I want an excuse to call or text, but is it too soon? Will she think I’m needy? Some women find that off-putting. Sometimes I wish my brain worked differently and I could be as confident as Viktor or as smooth as Bowen.
“I’ve got it,” I tell Soot at lunchtime. “I’m going to go check on my parents’ house. Bring in their mail. Make sure there are no leaky pipes or anything.”
Soot yawns. She has no patience for my shenanigans.
When I drive by Dot’s house, though, Coach’s car is missing. Is she visiting him, or taking the dogs to the vet? I could text and ask, but there’s no good way to explain that I justhappenedtobe driving by and justhappenedto notice that her dad’s car was gone.
I’m a pathetic stalker. Yup. That’s me.
I pull into my parents’ driveway to do what I came here, in theory, to accomplish. I’m gathering the mail when Cash steps outside a few doors down.
On impulse, I lift my hand and start walking toward him. Cash swears and whips around, as if to go back inside.
“Cash!” I break into a jog. “Do you have a sec?”
“No. I’m busy. I need to, uh.” He blinks a few times. “Aw, hell. What do you want?”
“I just… I need some advice.”
Cash drags one hand across his face. “Does your father not have a phone?”
I shake my head. “Not once have I called my father that he hasn’t answered on speaker phone.”
“So?”
“So, this is not the kind of conversation I want to have on speaker phone.”
Cash crosses his arms. “But you’re okay with having it on my front lawn.”
I gesture to the empty street. “Yes? Unless my mom’s somehow listening to this, in which case, I have questions.”
“Ugh. Can I talk you out of it?”
I tilt my head. I don’t know Cash as well as some of the other neighbors from my childhood, but Knight always said that his dad gave good advice. Besides, he cares enough about Dot that he called Knight to make sure she was okay. Plus, Coach and Cash are friends. He might have insight that I don’t.
