Page 19 of Love on the Brain
He had a point. He was a very big man.
Jane took the bottle from him and took a swig.
“What are you doing?” Ryan asked.
“I’m not letting you drink alone.”
“But—”
“I don’t plan to get drunk, either. Neither of us plans to drive, and the roads aren’t bad yet. We won’t overdo it. But I think we both could use a little liquid stress relief, no?”
Ryan averted his gaze. “I guess. I like the feel of the burn. Affirmative and punishing at the same time.” He turned back to her. “You know, if you wanted to imbibe, I got you. And Noah.”
“You’ve always looked out for me,” Jane said, relieved that his voice lacked judgment. “You’re a good man, Ryan.”
“You’re my Jane,” he said simply.
She shivered, remembering how Casey had referred to her when they’d met.So you’re Ryan’s Jane. It’s great to finally meet you.It’d stuck, even when she officially and legally became Casey’s Jane.
“Remember the first time you had cinnamon fire tea? The whiskey version?” Ryan asked.
“My twenty-first birthday, at the country bar. The ‘tea toddy’ sounded pretty harmless. Some starter drink that was!” Jane chuckled.
“The look of surprise on your face—priceless!” Ryan laughed.
“And now it’s a comfort. It clears my mind and my sinuses,” she joked.
Taking a deep breath to clear her thoughts, she gathered the throw pillows from the sofa and chose a spot between the coffee table and the fireplace. She arranged them against the front of the table and patted the shag carpet next to her. “Come sit. Tell me why you crave the burn.”
Without a word, Ryan did as he was told and sat next to her and pulled his long legs in like a child. Leaning his forearms on his thighs, he stared at the fire.
“It reminds me I’m not a robot. That I’m human and I feel and emote, even when I can’t allow myself to.”
“I get that. I compartmentalize to survive. Otherwise, I couldn’t get through the day.” Deciding to forgo the tumbler, she took a sip from the bottle.
The whiskey began to take effect, and Jane relaxed, leaning back into the pillows.
“Whatcha thinkin’?” Jane asked.
He didn’t answer right away, pressing his lips together, the skin in his chin wrinkling as it did when he was deep in thought. “Do I … look at you weird?” he asked.
Jane detected a note of hesitation in his question. “No,” she assured him. “You look at me the same way you’ve always looked at me.”
Ryan’s eyes widened, and he took the bottle from where she’d placed it on the table. Not bothering to pour it into his glass either, he tipped it high and took a sip. “And how is that, exactly?”
What an odd line of questioning.Jane shrugged. “I don’t know. Like you’re happy to see me. Like a best friend.”
He nodded but didn’t comment.
She was curious. “Why do you want to know?”
He looked at her, catching her gaze. Their eyes locked, and her breath caught. The raw emotion in his expression caught her off guard.
He turned back to looking at the fire. “Just something Sunny said.”
Now Jane was even more curious. “What did she say?”
He shrugged. “Was she ever … unkind to you?”
