Page 43 of Love on the Brain
“I win!” Noah exclaimed.
“You sure did,” Ryan said. “Congratulations!” He set the remote down and held his hand up for a high five.
Noah jumped to his feet. “A high five isn’t enough. This needs our secret handshake. You remember it? It’s two fist bumps, then three claps.”Bump, bump, clap, clap, clap. “Then you shake hands.” Noah held Ryan’s hand. “Now sliiiiiiide your hand out and wiggle your fingers and say pwooosh like a ’plosion!”
“Pwooosh!” Ryan opened his hands for the explosion, and Jane’s gut twisted. He was so good with Noah. Why did life have to be so complicated?
“You are very good,” Noah said. “Do you practice?”
“Actually, your mom and I made it up in college. So I’ve had a lot of practice.”
“Really? I thought JC made it up.” He scratched his head and looked to Jane for confirmation.
“I taught it to Shelby,” she said. “She probably taught it to JC.”
“I should get going,” Ryan said, picking up his jacket from where he’d slung it over the arm of the couch. “I’ll see you all at church tomorrow?” He looked past her to Dale and Connie. Was he hurt that she hadn’t responded to his dinner invitation, or was he giving her space?
Let your heart decide this.The voice in her head was loud and clear.
“We’ll be there,” Connie said, shooting her a glance.
Ryan turned to her. “If you want some good steak tips for dinner, just text me and I can get them to go if you want a quiet house to yourself tonight. I know you don’t get much alone time.”
That was true, but… “That’s very thoughtful of you. I would like to go out to dinner, though, if you still want to?” Jane’s heartbeat quickened, and she caught the unsure note in her voice.
A wide grin spread across his face. “Sure do. Pick you up at six?”
Jane’s cheeks heated as she nodded. She hoped Dale and Connie didn’t notice. What would they think if she and Ryan … oh goodness. Her hand flew to her stomach, as if pressing on it could calm her nerves and guilt.
When the door closed behind him, Jane grabbed her tote and suitcase and escaped up the stairs and down the hall to the guest room. She sank onto the bed and reached for a pillow. Hugging it to herself, she lay down and stared at the pictures in the frames on the nightstand. Her and Casey’s wedding photo. Noah on his first birthday. Casey and Ryan at their high school graduation.
A soft knock pulled her from her thoughts.
“Come in.”
Connie padded over to the bed and sat by Jane’s knees. She followed Jane’s gaze to the pictures. “I know you miss him. It’s still hard, and I don’t think it’ll ever get easier. Every time I want to tell him something, I forget he’s gone. And then my memory kicks in.” She rested a comforting hand on Jane’s shoulder.
“Yeah,” Jane whispered. “He’s missing everything. Noah’s milestones and birthdays and health battles…”
“He is. And Noah is missing a father figure. He may not understand that yet, and by no means am I telling you to find him one, but I know someone who loves him like he’s his own son, and from what I’ve seen of the two of you together, there’s love and friendship and mutual respect there, too. If there are sparks on top of all that, then I’d encourage you to pursue finding love for a second time, Jane. You have our blessing to move forward.”
Jane buried her face in the pillow. She didn’t know what to say.
“I know your dad never remarried, but he and your mom were together for more than twenty years. You’re still so young, and I don’t believe you were meant to be alone indefinitely. Anyway, I don’t want to make you sad or uncomfortable. I just need you to know that we want you to be happy, whatever that looks like, because we love you.”
Jane lifted her head from the now-damp pillow. “Thank you.”
Connie leaned over and hugged her. “You’ll still be our daughter-in-love, even if we have to share you. Please know thatnothingwill ever change that.”
Relief and overwhelm coursed through Jane, and she sobbed even harder. Connie held her while she cried, and Jane wished for the billionth time that her own mother was alive to share these kinds of moments.
* * *
After a quick triphome to collect an outfit better suited to date night at a steakhouse, Ryan decided to pass the time at his parents’ place so that when six o’clock rolled around, he’d already be there. Besides, he didn’t want to spend any more time than he had to in his empty house, not since he’d experienced what it was like when it was full.
The weather had warmed considerably, and the hammock chair on the back porch called to him like a siren song. He settled into it and closed his eyes.
“You must be Jane,” Casey said, offering his hand. “I feel like I know you already.”
