Page 27 of Red Zone Realizations
She opens her mouth, no doubt to instinctually say whatever first comes to mind, but quickly closes it.
I wait for her to speak.
She starts her slow circle around me. Checking me over and biding her time. Just the sense of her eyes roving over me sends shivers down my spine. “I really like you…”
My heart beats one big thump at the words. “But?”
“But… this is very new.” She sighs as if giving in to her own doubt. “I can feel this thing between us growing and it’s terrifying. I have lived all the highest highs and the lowest lows that you can in a relationship, and I don’t know if I have the strength to do that again.”
“You do.” I take her by the shoulders. “I won’t hurt you.”
“You can’t guarantee that.” She looks defeated. Like she spent too many years trying to get people to see her, and everyone insisted on wearing blindfolds.
“I’ll do anything to make you feel safe with me.”
“I thought about it earlier, and all I can offer you right now is friends.” I take a step back from her, dropping my hands from her shoulders.
“So, no to being my girlfriend?”
“Not yet.”
“But yes to hanging out?”
She nods. I pull her to my chest and wrap my arms around her. “We can talk as long as you need. I’m not in any rush, Audrey. I’m willing to take whatever you’re willing to give.”
In order to do that, though, I need to be in Houston, which means I cannot fall prey to the distraction that working to gain Audrey’s confidence will provide.
“Don’t be nervous,” Audrey says as she guides my hand where she wants it. “They don’t bite.” Her guinea pigs dance below, excitedly awaiting the carrot in my hand. They stand on their hind legs and snatch it from me as soon as it’s within their reach. I never really thought that much about guinea pigs before now, but in person they’re so cute. Their little faces and their squeaks do bring a smile to your face. We lean over the cage, shoulder to shoulder, and watch Reba and Dolly tug the carrot back and forth between them, both trying to take more bites.
“Enough, girls. There’s plenty to go around.” She puts another carrot on the bottom of the cage.
“This cage is huge.” It takes up all the space on a huge built-in between the kitchen and the living room. It has hiding spaces, hammocks, beds of hay, and it’s lined with fleece.
“The cages they sell at the store actually aren’t big enough. They’re social creatures, which means you need to have morethan one, which means more space.” She gestures at the big cage.
“Do you take them out?”
She laughs. “Of course, they’re staples of Nicole and my’sSurvivornights. We all sit on the couch with our food together.”
“Do you ever make games for them?”
She gives me a mischievous smile. “Do you want to make them a maze?”
“Absolutely I do.”
“Be right back.” I watch as she goes out the side door and into the garage. She comes back carrying a huge cardboard box, a roll of tape, and a pair of scissors. We lay out all the supplies on the living room floor.
“So, this big piece will be the bottom, and we’ll use the other pieces to make walls, then tape them together.”
I sit on the floor next to her and start cutting pieces of cardboard. Audrey picks up the pencil she brought and outlines where the walls should go. I look at it over her shoulder. “Two dead ends? You’re harsh.”
“They’re smarter than you think. They’ll crack it in no time.”
The sounds of tape ripping and cardboard cutting fills the air, and an easy silence falls between us. As we tape and make walls, I feel a warmth grow in my chest. This doesn’t feel like a date. It feels more like a glimpse of what a regular weekend evening could be with Audrey in the future.
I watch as Audrey puts the last piece of tape in place and sits back on her heels to admire our handiwork. “Do you want to pick one up and bring her over?”
I put my hand behind my head to rub my neck, a little nervous. “Sure.” These are her furbabies and I’ve never pickedone up before. What if it squeals or bites me or jumps out of my hand? We stand by the cage again.
