Page 31 of Her Tiger of a Duke
“And you were not listening to reason,” she snapped, closing her book and placing it in her lap. “I am not going to have this same discussion with you repeatedly. I knew what I was doing, and I will not be treated like a child when I am not one. I am entrusted with the running of a household. I can be trusted to swim three feet.”
Once again, there was that passion that was seemingly only reserved for him. He should have been infuriated by it, but all that Owen could think was how pretty she looked when she blushed in her fury.
“I understand,” he replied. “It will not happen again.”
She picked up her book again, finding her page.
“If I may,” he continued, “and do not think that I am being unkind, might I ask you if you miss your friends?”
She narrowed her eyes at him, but he had apologized and admitted his wrongdoing and so she had no real need to be angry with him any longer. This time, when she closed her book, she placed it on a table beside her and folded her hands in front of her.
“I miss them every day,” she sighed. “They were all that I had for a long time, and when I saw them at our wedding it was as though nothing had changed, but of course everything had. I am as like them as ever now, and yet that distance is still there.”
“What do you mean by distance?”
“If I tell you, do you promise not to be angry with me?”
“I will not be angry.”
“Very well. I am a duchess but not like them at all. I do not have a husband who loves me, nor children that I hold affection for. I do not host lavish events and take care of my family.”
“That is to be expected, is it not? We have been married but a short time.”
“Which is precisely my point. I have been living this way for more than a week, not years like they have. They always wanted more for me, but I think they had resigned to fate the way I had. I was not supposed to be someone’s wife.”
“Have you always thought so lowly of yourself?”
The question caught her off guard, and she adjusted her position in clear discomfort.
“I suppose that I have. I was not raised to believe that I was anything special, and that was bound to affect me. My friends always refused to believe it, and they tried to convince me that I was deserving of love and marriage and all those splendid things, but I knew the truth.”
“Why did you not listen to them?”
“Because I could not. You are much the same. You have thought things for years, since your mother died it would seem, and my telling you that it is untrue does not change that. It is the same with my friends. My father– my father always told me that I was unworthy of a match, though he would never elaborate, and that is what remained with me. My friends, who had to be kind to me, could not fix that simply by telling me a string of falsehoods.”
“Is that to say you still do not know what his issue is?” Owen asked, shaking his head. “I have never known a father to be so cruel.”
“Even your own?”
Before he could answer, the butler arrived to inform them that their dinner was prepared. Owen was grateful for that, as there was nothing he could say about his father without revealing things that he was not yet prepared to share.
Despite how their outing had ended, their dinner passed with easy conversation, their prior disagreements as good as forgotten. Owen hoped that Beatrice was as happy as he was about that, for he did want them to continue to enjoy oneanother’s company. He would take her to an inn another time, before her friends arrived, and show her what the village truly offered.
“As I was saying before,” he told her, “I thought that you might be missing your friends, and so I have invited them to stay with us for a short while. They should arrive sometime next week.”
He wondered if he had acted prematurely. Given the way she sat quietly and stared at him for a long moment Owen started to think that he had, but she eventually smiled at his words.
“Thank you,” she replied. “I look forward to their visit greatly. Before that happens, though, might it be all right if we make a few changes to the household?”
“What did you have in mind?”
“Nothing too spectacular, but there are some things that are… well, they seem rather outdated.”
“If there is anything not to your tastes, you are more than welcome to change it. Mrs. Forsythe will be happy to help you. She has been requesting various refurbishments for years.”
At that, she began eating happily again, and Owen wondered just how much she wished to change. Part of him hoped it was more than she had suggested.
CHAPTER 13
