Page 69 of Guarded Secrets
“Thank you.”
When he continued unpacking the groceries, she leaned against the counter, head tilted as she watched him. “Have you ever talked about this?”
He shook his head.
“Tell me what happened.”
“Let’s get breakfast first. We can talk after.”
She nodded. Peering into the bakery bag, she asked, “What’d you get?”
“Bagels.”
He set bananas and strawberries on the counter along with a loaf of bread and a tub of cream cheese. Then, after using a serrated knife to slice the bagels, he stuck them in an ancient toaster oven.
She rinsed the berries, sliced them and a banana into small bowls she’d found in the cupboard, all the while telling herself not to get used to the cozy domestic scene she and Owen made. He believedwhatever had happened with his family made him unworthy or undeserving of having a family in the future.
Owen laid a piece of plywood over a couple sawhorses and placed folding chairs on either side. In minutes, they were sitting at the makeshift table with an excellent breakfast.
Keeley slathered cream cheese over her toasted cinnamon raisin bagel and took a bite. Chewing slowly, she wondered what’d happened to Owen’s family.
He sat across from her looking a little lost. She wished she could help ease his pain but wasn’t sure he’d let her past his defenses. So she asked him questions about the remodel and how he planned to furnish the house, thinking maybe a simple conversation would help him feel more comfortable.
***
Eating toasted bagels and drinking coffee while Keeley chatted openly, Owen felt some of his tension ease. He figured that was her goal, and was grateful for the reprieve it gave him.
His entire adult life he’d followed a hard-and-fast rule that no one needed to know his shit. But it was different with Keeley. It didn’t matter they had no future together, he wanted her toknowhim. To understand him in a way no one else did. It wouldn’t change anything, it couldn’t, but maybe by knowing, she’d getwhyhe couldn’t be with her, and she wouldn’t hate him.
“I don’t like talking about what happened. Other than my mom and stepdad, I never shared it. But if anyone has a right to know, it’s you.” They’d finished their meal and he rose to his feet, face set in serious lines.
“Let’s go out to the porch. No swing, but I have a couple chairs out there.”
“Okay.” Mug in hand, she followed him out the door. They sat side by side in camp chairs, a chilly wind gusting.
She pulled her robe tighter around her. He rose and ducked back in the house, coming back with a fleece blanket he dropped over her legs.
Sitting again, he stared into the distance where Sisters lay nestled in a forested bowl.
He fucking hated it but prepared to bare his soul.
“After high school, I didn’t know what the hell I wanted to do with my life. I’d taken auto shop classes and got a job as a mechanic changing oil, brake fluid, replacing filters, because that’s all they’d let an eighteen-year-old kid do. I figured I’d do that until I could work out a better plan. I was seeing this girl. Her name was Gloria. I was young and dumb. We both were, and she got pregnant.”
“Oh Owen.”
“Yeah. We weren’t in love. At best you could say we were in lust. But my mom had gotten pregnant, and that dude hadn’t stuck around. Mom kept contact with his family, but there was nothing they could do to get him to take responsibility.” He shrugged. “I wasn’t going to be that guy. I wanted to do the right thing. I bought her a ring, we got married, and I joined the Marines.
“Joining the military was the only way I could see to provide for my family. I’d get regular pay, medical benefits, and housing.”
“That’s honorable.”
He shrugged. “Maybe. Mom was okay with it. We’d been living in Fullerton in Southern California. She’d married Eddie, my stepdad, and he wanted to move to Phoenix with my stepsister, but I didn’t want to go with them. If I joined the military, I’d have base housing for me and my family.
“Add to that, I was a wild kid and Mom thought I needed the discipline I’d get in the military. She wasn’t wrong. My grandparents lived here in Sisters. They wanted me to go to college, but I wasn’t ready for that.”
Keeley’s expression turned somber. “What did Gloria think?”
“Mixed bag there. She liked being engaged, liked going to parties with a fiancé who was a Marine. She wanted to keep doing what we’d been doing.
