Page 95 of Doxy for the Ton
The woman who stared back at her bore an expression of regret, and hope. She steeled herself and shifted her expression until the woman in the mirror was, once more, the elegant Lady Rex.
“Is your hair not to your satisfaction, your ladyship?”
“It’s beautiful as usual, Gracie.”
“The duke will be even more in love when he sees you tonight,” the maid said.
“Don’t talk nonsense, Gracie,” Mimi replied, as her cheeks flushed pink in her reflection.
“But ma’am…”
Mimi reached up and took her maid’s hand. “Gracie, your words are kindly meant, but I cannot afford to think of love.”
The maid resumed working on her hair.
When pleasure risked her downfall, what might love do to her soul, other than destroy it?
Mimi forced a smile and nodded encouragement to her maid to continue.
She had come close to pleasure when he’d last visited—the feel of him inside her, filling her completely, and the expression in his eyes as he came to pure bliss. And when he cried her name, his voice deep and soulful…she had almost succumbed. It had taken every last drop of resolve to stem the swell of pleasure that had ignited deep inside her body, flaring with each touch of his hands and mouth.
That had been almost a sennight ago, and he hadn’t visited her since. But perhaps that was for the best. His absence had given her leave to visit Mrs. Briggs and console herself in honest, hard work. And she had summoned the courage to take a walk in the park alone, holding her head high, as befitted the respectable widow of a knight. The excursion had not been without its pleasures, as she encountered Eleanor taking the air with her sister and brother-in-law, Lord and Lady Radham. But when Lord Radham had let slip that he was a vicar, Mimi was reminded of just how far beneath these people she existed.
She closed her eyes, recalling the last vicar she’d encountered in her former life: a man caught up in his own piety, who referenced his sermons when casting judgment on her while demanding she service his body—a man who believed himself above the messages he preached, including the basic principle of kindness to others. Would Lord Radham, civil as he was when he believed her to be a knight’s widow, treat her with contempt and cruelty if he knew she was a whore?
No—Society would spit on her if they knew the truth. She may have belonged in this world years ago, but that was another life.
A life she had forgotten, untilhehad blundered into her world, setting her pulse racing and her heart aching. He had made her feel again, when feelings were a luxury she couldn’t afford, not even for two thousand guineas.
Alexander…
Her maid’s eyes widened, and Mimi cursed herself for voicing his name. Did Gracie know that Mimi whispered his name as she brought herself to pleasure in her cold, empty bed? But the craving that had grown in her soul was no longer satisfied by her own hand, the release all too brief, leaving her hollow.
And now, she was on the brink of seeing him again. Tonight would call upon her resolve.
She caught a flash out of the corner of her eye as her maid held up the necklace that had arrived yesterday, along with a brief note telling her to be ready to receive him tonight at six. As Gracie placed it about her throat and secured the clasp, Mimi ran her fingertips over the stones—five diamonds of increasing size, either side of a single amethyst.
“I’ve never seen anything so beautiful, ma’am,” the maid said. “It’s perfect for you. The color matches the embroidery on your gown and emphasizes the color of your eyes. The duke is to be admired for his taste.”
“Doubtless there was little thought put into the gift, Gracie,” Mimi said. “A man of his means can pay others to acquire gifts on his behalf.”
“If you say so, ma’am.”
A clock struck six in the distance, and Mimi’s heart leaped with anticipation.
No—I must not descend into such girlish nonsense!
Mimi rose and let her maid place her cloak about her shoulders. Her heart fluttered at the memory of a similar act, when Alexander had placed the bedsheet about her naked form with a tender reverence that threatened to breach her defenses.
She heard a knock on the main doors and made her way to the top of the stairs, where she saw Charles cross the hallway floor below.
“If I may be so bold, ma’am,” the maid said, “may I make a request?”
“Anything, Gracie.”
“Enjoy your evening. And take friendship where it’s offered.”
Mimi patted her maid’s hand. “I will.”
