Page 142 of Doxy for the Ton
“He still loves you. I’m sure of it.”
“Eleanor, please.”
“I know I mustn’t speak of it, and I wouldn’t say anything in front of anyone else—not even my sister. But I noticed a transformation in him when he was with you. I confess I never could abide him. But when he was with you, I surprised myself by beginning to contemplate the possibility of liking him a little.”
“And now?”
“I’ve seen him in London a few times since…”
Mimi held her breath as her heart rate increased. “Was he well?”
“He seemed in good health.”
“And…happy?”
Eleanor shrugged. “He wasn’t smiling, but few people smile unless they know they’re under observation.”
“No, I mean”—Mimi hesitated, hope and fear warring with each other—“was he with company?”
“Oh!” Eleanor cried. “You mean was he with a woman—a lover?”
Mimi winced at Eleanor’s bluntness. But she couldn’t berate her friend. Eleanor didn’t adopt the niceties of Polite Society. She asked direct questions and gave direct responses.
“He was alone,” she said at last. “Except when I saw him at Lord and Lady Walton’s soirée. In fact, Lady Walton inquired after you. I’m sure I could persuade her to send a donation to the school—she’s another who applauds the independence of women.”
“Hardly independent if I’m reliant on the charity of others,” Mimi said.
“May I ask you a personal question?” Eleanor said. “I’m afraid you may think it forward of me, but I’m curious.”
“Then ask.”
“Are you lonely?”
“What an odd question!”
“Forgive me, I meant no offense.”
“I know,” Mimi said. “No, I’m not lonely. I have friends—you and your sister. There’s Lily and Sam, and I’ll soon have the school to occupy myself with. I’ll be too busy to be lonely.”
“No, I meant…” Eleanor shook her head. “Forgive me, Mimi, but I thought you were also in love. You don’t deserve to spend your days alone. Montague has friends who—”
“Eleanor, I dream of freedom, not a husband.”
“The two aren’t always mutually exclusive.”
“But in most cases they are,” Mimi said. “Besides, I could no longer look at another man without seeing…”
Without seeing Alexander: the way his lips quirked into a smile each time he saw her, the soft sighs he’d made as she brought him to pleasure—and the intensity in his eyes when she had let him kiss her…
She shook her head. “You heard Lord Radham. Alexander has moved on to the next woman without a backward glance. I did the right thing by leaving before it was too late.”
“Unless itisalready too late,” Eleanor said. “You still love him, don’t you?”
Mimi blinked back the moisture in her eyes.
“He still lovesyou,” Eleanor added. “I’m certain of it.”
A person always claimed certainty when they sought to convince others of that which they knew to be false.
