Page 34 of Heartbreaker of the Ton
“She’s Sir John Fulford’s bastard?” He cringed at the ugly word and shook his head. “Why add to her disgrace? A child out of wedlock is enough of a pariah. Few know the full circumstances of her birth. Outside her family, excepting the”—he hesitated, fighting the bile rising in his throat—“thefather, none but myself and one other.”
“Loveday Smith?”
Heavens—was she a witch in possession of the ability to read the mind of another?
He nodded. “And nowyou.”
She turned her head toward the window, her face pale in the sunlight.
“Forgive me, I didn’t mean to distress you,” he said. “Freda was sent into service, as most young women are, but her master…”
She raised her hand. “There’s no need to explain. A man in an elevated position in Society will, in my experience, always take advantage of those he considers beneath him. It was my fault for asking.” She let out a sigh. “Poor Frances—to carry the burden of always reminding others of the man responsible for the death of her…sister.”
“Perhaps now you understand the depth of Mrs. Gadd’s gratitude when you agreed to take Frannie on. She had no wish for the child to suffer Freda’s fate.”
“Or Loveday Smith’s, I presume.” She resumed her attention on him. “Frances told me Loveday worked in the scullery at Sandcombe Place until she quickened with child. She’s going back there when her baby’s old enough. Her husband…” Her voice trailed off, and she stared at him. “Does her husband know that her child is another’s?”
Andrew nodded. “He offered for her knowing she carried another man’s child.”
“And he’s willing to have her work there?”
“They need the money.”
“But—she’s being placed in danger!” she cried. “Why is nobody doing anything to prevent it? Why aren’tyou?”
“By rights, she’s the property of her husband,” he said. “I do all I can to ensure her safety. Believe me, she’s safer at Sandcombe Place. The cook is an understanding woman, and has promised to keep Loveday below stairs.”
“Oh, ofcourse,” she said, a sneer in her tone. “It’s the woman’s responsibility to avoid the man who wants to seduce her—just as it’s her responsibility to deal with the consequences.”
“Loveday loves her children, no matter who the father is,” Andrew said.
“I wasn’t doubting that,” she retorted. “A mother’s love is something you’ll never understand. But nevertheless, Sir John’s life is unaffected by his actions—a moment’s gratification, then he can carry on as if nothing happened and forget about the woman he seduced. It’s Loveday who pays the price, no matter how much she may love her children.” She shook her head. “I thoughtLondonwas debauched! I came here to the country to escape the depravity of the town, only to find it far worse here. How can you sit there and do nothing?”
“There’s only so much I can do,” he replied, swallowing his shame. “Each night I pray for the strength to help everyone in need. But I can’t.”
“I’m not asking you to helpeveryone. Just one person.”
“And I have,” he said. “I’ve ensured that Frannie Gadd is safe from harm, from…”
She drew in a sharp breath and wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Safe from being seduced by the man who sired her?” She shookher head. “What world do we live in that permits such vile acts? What is to be done?” She shuddered and she let out a soft sob.
He caught her hands and lifted them to his lips. “Hush, Etty,” he whispered. “I beg you not to distress yourself. We live in a good world—I have to believe that. And we cannot fight all evils. Some battles are too insurmountable to win. The best we can do is choose those with which we have a chance of success, to help where we can be assured of making a difference.”
“How can you say such things when you know such misery exists?”
“Because I must,” he said. “It’s what I have to do to prevent myself from giving up. A single man against the tide of the world is in danger of being dashed to pieces and drowned if he seeks to fight it. Do you not think I struggle every day when I see the injustice being heaped upon the people here at the hands of my patron? Do you not think that I struggle with my faith, my vocation, when I know that my bishop, despite his position in the church, would side with the very men who benefit from and perpetuate the injustices of the world?”
“You can fight them,” she said.
“I am but one soldier facing an army,” he replied. “In fighting openly I would be cut down at the first stroke—and what good would that do for the likes of Frannie Gadd and Loveday Smith? So I do what is within my power, to protect them as best I can.”
Her expression of disapproval, mingled with deep sorrow, tore at his heart. More than anything he wanted her approval, even if he could never hope to earn her admiration.
Or her love.
He reached for her hands and gave an inward sigh of relief when she didn’t snatch them away.
“Did someone hurt you?” he asked softly. “Is that why you care so deeply about Frannie?”
