Page 146 of Oddity of the Ton
“I know that I’ve not stopped thinking of her from the day we parted,” Monty said. “Every waking moment I wonder if she’s well—and happy—and I wish I could be with her again.”
“That’s not love. That’s obsession and a selfish wish to enjoy the company of one of the loveliest women to walk this earth.”
“In part, I agree with you,” Monty said. “Eleanoristhe loveliest woman to walk this earth. I’m not asking because I wanther—I’m asking because I cannot live without her. And whatever her sister did, you cannot lay the blame atmyfeet.”
“Oh, can’t I?” She stepped forward, her face flushed with anger. “Don’t you see the consequences of your actions? That the ripples from your false engagement spread across Society? When you, the worst rake of theton, made such a public offer to Eleanor—a woman the whole of Society thought to be decidedly beneath you in looks, temperament, and station—you gave false hope to every fortune-hunting young woman hungry for a title. Even the meanest of wits would surmise that Juliette attached herself to Dunton in the hope that, with one duke marrying into the Howard family, a second could more easily be persuaded. And Dunton—foul lecher that he is—took advantage, and added Juliette to the list of maidens he deflowered.”
“Lavinia!” Marlow said. “Whitcombe doesn’t wish to hear—”
“Perhaps Ido,” Monty said. “Perhaps, as your good wife says, it’s time I opened my eyes to the full consequences of my actions. Including that of my own heart.”
He gestured to the drawing on the wall.
“Lady Marlow—I’ll confess that I do think primarily of myself, and of the better man that I can be with Eleanor in my life. But on seeing this drawing… A few lines on a piece of paper have shown me that I am not the only one who suffers in her absence. I can see that you have lost a friend who loves you dearly.”
“How can you see that?” she asked.
“I see it in your portrait,” he said. “Every stroke of her pencil—every mark—has been delivered with love. It’s a love to be envied.” He swallowed, drawing in a sharp breath to temper the moisture pricking at his eyes. “I recognize, and honor, that love, for I’ve seen it before.”
“Where?” she asked in a whisper.
He blinked, and a tear splashed onto his cheek. “In a sketch she drew of me, which she gave me leave to keep. A-and in other sketches that she kept, which…”
His cheeks burning, he averted his gaze.
“So it’s true,” she said. “The gossips said Juliette had displayed a sketch of Colonel Reid. But the subject wasyou, wasn’t it?”
Monty nodded.
“How could you have been so foolish?”
“Because she asked me—she said she wanted something to remember me by.”
Marlow let out a snort. “You certainly gave herthat, old boy. I think—Ouch!” he let out a cry as his wife slapped his arm.
“The less you say, the better, Peregrine.”
“I must defend my friend,” Marlow said. “I saw a different man at Rosecombe to the one I’ve always known. Even I can see that he loved Eleanor.”
“Then why end your engagement?” Lady Marlow asked.
“Believe me—that’s a question I’ve asked myself every waking moment,” Monty said. “Before we parted, I’d long lost any understanding of why our engagement had to come to an end, other than it’s what we’d both agreed from the start.”
“And your male pride dictated that you ought never to be seen to change your mind.”
“My mind—and my heart—changed a long time ago, Lady Marlow,” Monty said. “But I was too afraid to admit it.”
“To yourself, or to my friend?” She tilted her head to one side, and the corner of her mouth lifted in a smile.
“You find my pain amusing?”
“No, Your Grace. But I marvel at how Fate conspires to ensure that the path we take comes full circle. Eleanor once told me that she loved you so deeply that she feared it. She feared both the influence it had on her every waking thought, but alsothat, were she to have it confirmed you thought little of her, it would destroy her.”
“Then you understand my pain, Lady Marlow,” Monty said. “Tell me—is that a fitting punishment for my sins?”
“Perhaps,” she said. “But it’s not a punishment I’d wish on anyone.”
“Then you’ll help me find her?”
