Page 14 of Her Dark Seduction
“Never.”
The low laugh vibrated through his chest. He moved against me and once more claimed me as his own.
He was right in that there was no pain this time. Yet, I felt no pleasure, only a burning need that intensified but was never satisfied, followed by a sense of loss when he withdrew. He turned his back to adjust his clothes and stood to leave.
“Where are you going, Monsieur?”
“Are you hungry for more pleasure?”
I pulled my nightshift down, mortified at my unwillingness to fight for my honor.
“You know nothing of pleasure except perhaps your own. Nothing of love…”
He laughed coldly. “I know all there is to know about pleasure. As for love—I love no woman.”
I turned my head away and jumped when he touched my chin. He ran a thumb across my lips, bruised and swollen from his kisses.
“And what of you? Are you foolish enough to know aught of love, my lady?”
“I have seen enough of the consequences of love to know it will bring me nothing but death.”
“Bitter words for one in such a privileged position.”
“Privileged?” I cried. “What if you get me with child?”
He shrugged. “Mortlock wants an heir. You merely need to convince everyone that he is the sire. As ’tis known you visit him nightly, it will be an easy task.”
“Why does he not take me himself?”
His body stiffened and he withdrew his hand. “Do you wish him to?”
“No!” I cried, shaking my head, trying to forget the image of my husband’s shriveled body, his wrinkled yellowing flesh against my skin.
“Lady, I would never…” Sawford spoke softly, reaching his hand out to me before his eyes hardened, his voice growing cold once more.
“My lord seldom takes pleasure from lying with a woman,” he said. “His first wives rarely quickened with child, and those who did were never able to carry them to full term. His body is diseased. The whores he took would sicken and die, and some of his wives met a similar fate. Others—well—they met their ends in other ways. He is not long for this world and wants a healthy heir before he leaves it. Rarely is his desire for an heir overshadowed by his wish to lie with a woman. It happens when…when he is in a particular frame of mind.”
“Then I must pray that never happens,” I whispered to myself but Sawford heard me.
“Prayer will not help you, woman, though foolish behavior will be your downfall.”
“Such as quickening with another’s child?” I cried. “Surely he’ll know the babe would not be his?”
“He merely wants an heir.”
So this was my purpose—and Sawford’s. To provide Mortlock with a son.
“Does he know ’tis you?” I asked.
Sawford shook his head. “He cares not for the sire. With such a mare in his possession, he does not concern himself with the stallion that mounts her.”
“What will become of me”—I spoke in a horrified whisper—“when I have fulfilled my purpose?”
“I know not. Once you have borne my lord a male heir, I will have my reward.”
“And what is that?”
“It concerns you not, woman.”
“Once he has no more use for me, will I share the fate of my predecessors?”
His lips curled into a sneer. “There are more important things, madam, than one insignificant, adulterous woman, naïve enough to expect happiness in marriage.”
“I never expected it in this marriage—or indeed any marriage,” I said, choking down a sob. “I expected sorrow, but not degradation and death.” I closed my eyes, attempting to stop treacherous tears from rolling down my cheeks. Moments later, I heard the door close and I was alone again.
At last, I understood my worth to my husband. He cared nothing for my lineage, mind or ability to tend to the people of his estate. I was nothing more than a vessel, akin to a farm animal intended to breed and then be discarded. I was no different from the servants Papa had taken, only I would be disposed of after a child was born—or earlier, if I did not quicken with child soon.
I had feared the destruction of my maidenhead would bring about my downfall, but Mortlock must have planned it from the day Papa offered me to him. I was trapped. Having engineered my adultery at the hands of another, my husband had not only secured the means to beget an heir but, also, the justification to rid himself of his new wife, however he saw fit.
Was this the fate Mortlock’s previous wives shared? If so, I would be lucky to be alive this time next year. Given the kind of life I would be leading here, I might welcome death when it came.
