Page 6 of Heavy is the Crown
“Ava!” I hear bellowed from across the room, and I see Ophelia and her boyfriend, Nyx, wave as they make their way over. The smile across her face as she spots me is undeniable. The crowd parts immediately, giving space for Nyx. While she is in a swimsuit with a small wrap around it, Nyx is dressed in all black, per usual. She’s the closet thing I have to a friend that I can call my own, despite having met her through my brother. The moment she makes it to my corner, she wraps me in a soft hug, her curves pressing into me. Her long curly hair has the scent of jasmine.
“Hey,” I say timidly. “I didn’t realize you guys would be here.” Subtext to Nyx,Don’t tell my fucking brother I’m here. His dark gaze pins me with a look that says he knows exactly what I want but isn’t guaranteeing I’ll get it.
Ophelia offers a wide grin, her freckles popping out on her makeup-free face. “Us?! We didn’t know you’d be here! Is Jax here?” She looks out over the dance floor. “Or Arcanna?”
I take a long sip of my drink, avoiding eye contact with Nyx.
“Deva. I think she’s here alone,” he says into her ear.
She frowns over at me. “Did you sneak out?” Ophelia was raised in a small town, so unlike the capital; in a lot of ways, her life was no different than mine has been. She was kept in a gilded cage until she broke free with Nyx at her side.
I give a noncommittal shrug, taking another healthy gulp of the alcohol in my hand. The taste is a little too sweet for me, but I need the liquid courage. Ever since that street race, I’ve done whatever I can to get out and away. The need for independence is an addiction that I can’t kick. And my brother's need to protect me is somethinghecan’t kick.
“I won!” I scream, ripping my helmet off. My body is still vibrating with adrenaline, heart pounding and hands shaking as I make my way toward my brother, a giant smile plastered on my face. His face, however, shows nothing but rage.
“And how the fuck do you think you won?” he growls.
I frown. “By racing.”
Arcanna grimaces behind him, and Oisin just shakes his head in disappointment.
“You are naive as fuck, Ava,” Jackson says.
Jax had used his magic, along with Oisin and Arcanna, to make sure I survived the race. It was the last time I ever saw a race. I’m still bitter about it.
Ophelia grabs my hand and pulls me into the crowd with a wide smile painted on her face. “Oh, we have to go dance!” I’m pretty sure that behind her, Nyx curses but allows her to drag me out into the middle of the sweaty bodies.
(“Gold Dust (Flux Pavilion Remix)” – DJ Fresh)
I’m unsure of myself standing with her, this confident woman who drops her hips and throws her hands in the air. She moves with such self-assuredness, I’m envious of that. Envious of her ability to be so carefree, even with her responsibilities. Nyx moves in behind her, and I watch his hands loop around her waist. I attempt to mimic her movements, but I feel dumb, awkward. I start to say I’m going to head back to my spot, but she wraps her hand around my wrist, pulling me into her body.
“Just copy me!” she yells into my ear and places my hands on her hips, the feeling strangely intimate, given Nyx’s hands are right there as well. “Stop thinking!” she says over the music.
Yeah, Ava. Stop thinking. This is why you snuck out.
Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes and lose myself to the music and the feel of her body pressed into mine.
Hours seem to pass while we go from dance floor to bar and back. By the end, the room is twirling, and my sides hurt from laughing so hard. After an eternity, I signal that I’m heading to the bathroom and slowly make my way out of the crowd. When I turn and look back at my friends, I can see Nyx locked onto Ophelia’s mouth, his hands creeping under that wrap over her bikini bottoms. I’m envious of what they have. I want that desperately.
It’s because of that desperation, and the alcohol, that when I see the blond-haired boy waiting in line for the bathroom, I don’t think twice about disappearing into a back bedroom with him.
(“Mermaids” – Florence and the Machine)
One would think sneaking into the royal palace would be much more difficult. But as my heels sink into the wet grass, I come to the chilling realization that my father only cares aboutus getting out. Or more accurately, me. His coveted little prize, his untouchable princess. The amount of dodging and weaving I had to do to get out could have given the best assassin a run for their money, but coming back, I barely have to hide myself as I move toward the side of the massive home. Covered by old shrubs, this door is known to very few. In fact, I would bet my soul that there are only four of us who know of its existence, none of which being my parents or any of the guards they employ.
I’m sure Jax regrets the day I figured this out.I snort. My older brother and his friends discovered it when we were younger. And being who I am, I followed them in and out many times. When he finally discovered me, he was furious. It took Oisin and Arcanna to calm him down. After that, we spent so many summer nights going in and out together. But that ended when I turned sixteen. Gone were the days when Jackson saw me as his little sister. Since then, he only sees me as the princess of Hell.
Pushing the ivy aside, I shove my weight into the oak barrier, my body screaming, until the door finally gives way and opens into a dimly light hallway of marble. The scent of stale air washes over me before it’s pulled out into the night sky. I will my magic up, a small flame of blue appearing in my hand as I shove the door closed behind me. Cobwebs litter the space and the flame I’ve created casts an eerie glow. The urge to run pushes through my bones, as if I’m being watched. I take a deep breath, refusing to race down the hall like I did as a child.
“I’m a grown woman. Princess of Hell. I will not run from imaginary ghosts,” I mutter, my words slurring slightly still. But my feet move at a quicker rate through the twisting space. I ascend higher and higher, until I can finally see a small strip of light penetrating the inky black air. A relievedwhooshleaves my lungs as I press my ear to the door. This would always be thetricky part—coming out of a coat closet like I’m walking out of Narnia does not look normal. After a few moments of silence, I twist the knob and step in.
When Jax and his friends first discovered this, they used it so much that my mother’s fur coats she kept in here began to show their secrets. With each pass by, more of the outside world would collect on them. After one particularly bad moment when Mother had a guard gut a maid in front of us for “neglecting” her precious coats, we decided something had to change. So, they slowly but surely replaced them with our own coats, putting her precious jackets in the hall closet closer to her room.
Jax's scent of smoke and evergreens washes over me as his green canvas jacket brushes my face.
Pausing one more time to listen, I step into the massive hallway just inside our front door. Bending down, I slip my ruined heels off my feet and sigh internally when my bare soles land on the cool white marble. With the alcohol rapidly leaving my system, I wince every time I move; the space between my thighs is tender. The hangover threatening to push inward is starting to fuel the shame and regret I feel for what happened earlier. I bite the inside of my cheek as I try to avoid making a sound, my steps wobbly. Waking up my parents won’t happen—Mother drinks herself to sleep every night, and my father probably isn’t even home yet. But my brother? Jackson can’t know I snuck out and can't know what happened. Getting past his room will be the hardest part of the night.
“And what did the cat drag in?” I cringe at the sound of my brother’s boyfriend’s voice. I turn slightly and see Oisin step out from the kitchen, his shirtless body silhouetted against the lights still blazing in the opposite room. Recently, Oisin has started to pay less attention to him and more attention to me. Having grown up with him, it initially didn’t bother me, butnow, the scrutiny makes my stomach curdle and my skin tingle unpleasantly.
