Page 60 of Heavy is the Crown
Tears threaten to spill as the intrusive thought pushes its way into my happy moment. It makes me angry, that my mind is refusing to shut the fuck up. Refusing to give me this.I’m giving up everything else, fucking give me this.
“You got tense, what's wrong?” Shadow’s voice breaks through my thoughts. I go to open my mouth to pour out some excuse, but he covers it with his tattooed hand instead. “I don’t want a lie, so if you aren’t ready to tell me, don’t say anything.”
The breath whooshes out of me and I only nod. Neither of us say another word, and I can appreciate that. Because if he had asked me again, I don’t think I could have held back.
THIRTY-THREE
Kallen,
Fuck, I hope this finds you. I instructed Samhain to give it to you, but I can’t be sure it made it.
I never thought I would be looking to you as someone to help my family.
But here we are. I’m trusting you.
– Ava
Ava
(“Dangerous Hands” – Austin Giorgio)
When we wake up the next morning, I slip quietly from the blankets, my skin feeling tight. I stand looking out over the city. I wrap my arms around my body, fingers digging into my sides. When Shadow’s presence moves up behind me, my need to feel him overpowers me.
I spin toward him. “I need you.” It’s all I have to say. His eyes go gold as he drops to his knees. “You look beautiful on yourknees for me,” I whisper, my voice sounding like smoke. He licks his lips but doesn’t say anything. I step back from him, dropping my satin robe so my naked body is silhouetted against the city landscape.
I watch the hunger flit across Shadow’s face as he sees my sex bared to him. His eyes rake over my naked body, snagging for only a moment on that brutal scar before meeting my eyes.
I back toward the couch until it hits the backs of my knees, then drop down on the edge of it. Beckoning him forward with two fingers, I spread my legs in invitation. “Crawl.”
He has no hesitation as he follows my instructions until he is directly between my spread thighs. I lift his chin with my fingers. His eyes are still blazing golden. “In here, I am in charge. That means you do nothing without my permission. If I tell you to do something and you don’t understand, you ask me.” I stroke his black hair as I talk. “Do you understand?”
“Yes,” he breathes.
I cock my eyebrow. “Yes, what?”
“Mistress.”
A wide smile splits my face. “Good boy. And how do we stop if you need to?”
“I don’t need that,” he growls.
“You might not, butIdo. I feed from your magic, Shadow. If things become too much, I need to know,” I explain. “And if you can’t do this, we won’t ever be able to be alone. And Iwanttime alone with both my mates. So, please. For me.”
Shadow still has little to no regard for his own safety and self-preservation. I worry that part of him hopes I’ll feed a little too deeply and he won’t walk away from it. I know he isn't using Eufori anymore, nor is he doing self-harm, but coping skills like those do not go away overnight. He still talks in his sleep, still cries out for the mother he lost, still holds onto that blame like a scarlet letter.
The silence stretches on, those golden eyes never leaving my silver ones, an array of emotions passing over them.
“Okay,” he says. “Red.”
“And if you can’t speak?”
He growls low. “My dragon won’t let it get to that point,” he says with conviction.
Narrowing my eyes, I debate on if I want to argue the point, but instead, I just nod. “Strip,” I command. He does so without question, shucking his shirt off quickly.
“May I stand, mistress?” he asks.
I smile widely. “Good boy, asking. Yes. Stand and take your pants off. After that, kneel again.” He moves without hesitation. His thick cock bobs out, and I salivate at the sight. Before he can kneel, I stop him with my hand splayed across the rippled muscles of his abdomen before taking his thick cock into my mouth. The salty taste permeates my senses. He groans low but keeps his hands at his sides as I take him in and out of my mouth lazily, fingers creeping up before I grip his hips hard and pick up the pace, fucking his length with my mouth.
