Page 13 of A Love So Wrong
The familiar scent brought back memories of her and Gideon walking down this road when they were younger. Having been let loose by Henry, he told them with a smile as he leaned on the open hood of his truck that they were free to explore the city and the woods around them as much as they wanted, and all he required for them was to stick together and be back home before dark. Just thinking about it, Jade could feel the stinging of moisture behind her eyes as she smiled at the memory.
She and Gideon had looked at each other in stunned silence that day before turning back to give the same disbelieving stare to Henry's laughing face. Assuring them he meant what he said, he gently steered them down the drive and beyond the open metal pasture gate of their property. On that first day, neither she nor Gideon wanted to go very far. Sticking to the shallow creek bed that bordered their property, they came right back within a few hours. But day after day, Henry urged the two kids who had only ever known the inner workings of larger cities to explore their new rural surroundings and slowly take to it. It didn't take long, either. Within a month, Gideon was leading her through fields, over downed trees, down to the beach, down lonely farm-to-market roads like he had been born there and not somewhere in the dregs of Houston like herself.
Shamelessly exploring the land around them was how they meet Ebony and her brother Gavin. Bursting through the tree line, she and Gideon froze when they realized at that moment, they were suddenly standing in someone's backyard. With her curly hair framing her head like a lion's majestic mane, Ebony had paused mid-swing on her swing set and stared back at them just as stunned. Being the ever-responsible person he was, Gideon had marched around the gigantic mansion and directly to the front door and rang the doorbell. Not at all scared of the towering man who answered the door, Gideon had asked very politely, if not a little sternly, if his sister could play with the man's little girl. Jade could still remember Mr. Rosebank's slow spreading smirk as he sized up the boy and her younger self hiding behind Gideon's back. With a nod, he had led them through the beautiful house and to the back while calling for his son from downstairs. The Rosebanks were the first people they met in Stardust Cove and, to this day, were still their closest friends.
Reaching the end of the road, Jade could see the open gate to her driveway up ahead. A memory of Gideon walking in this very spot leading her back from Ebony's house flashed in her mind. She could still see his narrow shoulders and unruly wavy hair blowing in the breeze. Sandra used to laugh and say Gideon was like a mother duck leading its duckling around the town. So much has changed since then, she thought. No longer the skinny little boy protectively escorting his sister back from her playdate, they were both grown up now. The image in Jade's mind changed, and she could imagine Gideon walking alongside her now instead of in front like he used to do. Now, he would just saunter next to her, most likely with his hands stuffed in his jean pockets as he grinned down at her and teased her about something or another. His skinny frame had, at some point grew into a man with wide, strong shoulders and matching broad chest. Molded by hours and hours of intense physical training for his sport, Gideon was no longer her brother to possess and hold onto. He was an attractive young man living in his golden college years surrounded by opportunity and attractive young women, Jade thought sourly. It was time for her to let him go—and she hated it.
Jade hated change. Rarely did anything good come from change, in her opinion. She missed the days when they were younger, where the summer days were hot and long, and all she ever had to think of was getting up and meeting Gideon at the breakfast table so he could tell her what adventure was in store for them that day. But those days were long gone, and now everything was different. Gideon was in college, and in a few years, he would graduate with his business degree, and though he never mentioned what his plans were beyond that, Jade could only close her eyes and swallow the lump of dread in her throat. Leaving Stardust Cove was inevitable, everyone knew that. While most people always eventually came back at one point in their life, never able to resist the pull of the idyllic little sea-side town, she wasn't certain she could survive, wondering if Gideon would or not.
Walking up the steps to the back door, Jade paused as she heard the intense coughing on the other side. Her heart sank a little. She had hoped that all the tea she had made Henry drink last night and the different cold medicine she bought would have worked. Opening the door, she met Henry's surprised eyes as he coughed a few more times from his plush reclining chair. The wet sounds rattled through his chest, and Jade could see that the coughing fits were sapping the man of all his strength. Rushing to the kitchen, she warmed up some tea she had premade last night. Adding some cinnamon, honey, and some lemon to it, she brought the hot concoction back over to him and waited until he settled down again.
Handing him the tea, she ignored his tired sigh as he accepted the tea he was growing to hate.
"Did you make an appointment?" Her authoritative tone held no room for excuses.
Making a face as he swallowed some tea, he let out a tired breath. "Yes, yes," he groused. "You gave me little choice. I made it for Thursday at two and…" he paused, glancing away from her guilty before taking a deep breath and looking back at her. "Gideon took my run for tonight. He is working his run and my run back to back, so he may be late for your birthday dinner tonight."
A pang of sadness tightened in her chest, but Jade pushed it away. Gideon was being sweet by taking dad's run. He knew dad needed to rest, and he also knew dad hated missing out on earning money. Leaving Henry to watch TV in peace, Jade walked through the den down the hall, passing Gideon's room and bathroom before turning into the kitchen. Sitting at the kitchen table surrounded by cookbooks, Sandra looked up with a large smile.
"Hello sweetie, how were Ebony and Taylor?"
Setting her gift bags in front of Sandra, Jade went to the sink as she recounted the morning’s events and washed her hands while Sandra gushed over Jade's gifts.
Pulling on the ruffled apron that hung in the pantry closet, Jade smiled to herself. The pink and white striped ruffle sleeved apron was ridiculous looking by itself but paired with her sneakers, t-shirt, and shorts, she knew she was a walking joke. It was probably a good thing Gideon wasn't here yet, Jade thought. Stepping into the kitchen doorway, Jade placed both fists on her hips and smiled at her mom.
"Ok, I'm ready," she announced. "What's the first step?"
*~*
Cutting into her steak, Jade took a bite chewing the barbequed meat slowly without tasting. The empty seat to her right felt like a black hole absorbing all the light from the room.
Looking across the silent table, her eyes landed on the guilty eyes of her father, staring directly back at her.
Putting down his fork, he wiped his mouth with a paper towel as he shook his head and looked down at his plate in sorrow. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart, it's all my fault."
Just before eight, she received a frustrated call from Gideon telling her he doubted if he was going to make her birthday dinner in time. Stuck in a traffic jam that was nearly ten miles long on the two-lane interstate, Gideon had sounded furious as he told her his GPS was putting him arriving home well after midnight. Hiding the disappointment in her voice, Jade had told him not to worry about it and to take his time and be careful.
"It's not your fault," she smiled at Henry. "You're in no condition to drive right now, and it’s just bad luck for the traffic jam. I'll see Gideon tomorrow, it's no big deal."
But they both knew that was a lie. Ever since they moved in together, she and Gideon had celebrated each other’s birthday with dedicated enthusiasm, never missing a minute of it. This would be the first time he wouldn't share her customary birthday dinner with her.
It's fine, she told herself as she gave both her mom and dad a happy smile, change is inevitable. She was changing. Gideon was changing. Life around them was slowly marching toward the future bringing in the subtle tides of change. She couldn’t just stand still and resist like she was inclined to do, she couldn’t stay a child forever. She would learn to accept these things: she would learn to date, learn to kiss, and maybe even learn to love change. Relaxing her shoulders, Jade did her best to throw off the mantle of disappointment by Gideon's absence as if to physically will her body to bend and sway with the unseen forces of fate that terrified her.
*~
Opening the door, Gideon didn't even give himself enough time to stay and see if it shut properly. Walking through the too-quiet house, his heart dropped into his stomach as he stepped into the living room and stopped. With only the old, nineteen-eighties curving floor lamp still on and shining over his chair, Henry pushed himself upward in the overstuffed reclining chair where he had been waiting up for him and turned to look behind him at Gideon's grim face. Guilt flashed in his eyes as he silently shook his head, telling Gideon all he needed to know in the one solemn gesture: she was asleep, and he was too late.
A volatile heat curled within his chest. Looking down at the floor, Gideon took a deep breath, forcing himself to gather control over the flames of his anger that licked at the walls of his restraint.
"I'm sorry, son," Henry's guilt-laden voice only made Gideon want to snap further. A tiny, petty part of him wanted to take his eyes off the floor and direct his no doubt scorching look at his father in blame. It washisrun that caused Gideon to be late and caused him to miss out on a sacred tradition he and Jade had kept for years. But just as the toxic thought entered his head, Gideon pushed it aside. It wasn't Henry's fault, it was the imbecile who somehow wrecked out on the goddamn interstate causing him to be late by four motherfucking hours. He knew it was wrong, but Gideon had found himself hoping the piece of shit died on impact.
"Don't worry about it," Gideon mumbled as he took a step forward to stand beside his father's chair. Leaning in, he gave the man a hug before stepping back. Reflexively his eyes landed on the door down the darkened hallway. No light peeked beneath the door's edge, no movement and no noise; she was asleep.
Turning, Gideon headed to his own room. The crinkle of tissue paper coming from his hand with each step in his hand served as an audible reminder of the night's failure. Setting the slightly wrinkled gift bag on his dresser, Gideon rubbed the back of his neck as he stared off into the distance. Was she angry? The thought didn’t get to finish in his mind before he blew out an exasperated breath as an answer. Fuck yes, she was going to be angry. Hell, he would be angry if she missed his birthday.
Stripping off all his clothes, Gideon crossed the short distance from his room to his bathroom without an ounce of shame. He knew no one would be coming back there, and Henry was most likely already settling down in bed after waiting up just for him. In the shower, he ran the soapy cloth across his chest and let his mind turn back to Jade. This would be the first time ever he missed her birthday—and the feeling did not sit right with him.
*~
