Page 91 of Break Me
“What about you? Aren’t you eager to get back out there?”
His smile faded. “I’m fine. I’m happy being Nina’s dad and nothing else.”
“So it’s the pot calling the kettle black.”
“Someone has to keep you in line.”
Maybe he was right. I glanced out the window at the beautiful skyline of the city. Maybe I just needed to shut down my emotions to protect myself from possible treachery. That was the smart thing to do. Just brush her off.
If that was the truth, then why were my hands clammy? Why hadn’t I been able to sleep? Why was it that thoughts of her and Emily had crowded into my mind at least twice an hour?
Well, fuck. Because I had it bad for her.
What the hell was I supposed to do now?
Halle
The harsh glares continued from almost every firefighter in the station. Granted, at least both Mark and Jeff had asked me about Emily, but the others had kept their cool demeanor.
Why was it that one public date with a powerful man had suddenly made me the enemy? I knew the answer. Because they were loyal to Sean and therefore loyal to Liam and the entire O’Leary family. The O’Learys had been a part of the landscape of firefighters for at least three generations.
They also hated the Russian influence. I’d even heard Sean say more than once the Dmitriyev family were bad seeds. It’s funny how I’d mostly ignored the rhetoric during our marriage because it hadn’t interfered with my life. I’d also learned early on that the Irish stuck by the Irish. The O’Shaughnessy family had settled in the Southwest a hundred years before and were considered mortal enemies of the Dmitriyevs.
I’d done some research while taking up a perch in the hospital. While the information had been limited, I’d been able to put a few pieces together.
“Don’t worry. I’ll pick Emily up from school today,” I told Kristine, trying to shield my voice. “Since it’s her first day.” I’d cried when I’d put her on the bus while she’d been excited, even trying to comfort me instead of the other way around.
“You don’t want her taking the bus.”
I drummed my fingers on the kitchen table. “I don’t want her suddenly approached by some horrible reporter. Plus, I just feel the need to keep her close.” I knew I was being followed, suspecting Alexsey wanted to ensure I wasn’t pestered. I was both grateful and a little bit put off by his continued influence in my life, but right now I couldn’t argue with the man. We hadn’t talked and it felt a little like both of us were taking a standoff position.
Kristine huffed. “You think the reporters would sink that low?”
“Hell, yes. I’m thinking about changing my cellphone number.”
“I wouldn’t blame you.”
“I know you have that appointment, but I just feel the need to hold her close. You know what I mean? Plus, it’s her first day. She’s growing up so fast.”
Kristine hesitated. I knew she was concerned about me. About both of us. I was so thrilled my little girl was home. She’d gotten the best care in the world and I had Alexsey to thank for it. He was never far from my mind and that was driving me crazy.
“I get it. Have you given any more thought to getting a support animal?”
The sigh erupting from my lips was even heavier than before. “Yes, and I’ve looked into the cost. Very pricy including vet visits, food. Toys. Hell, I can barely feed Emily and me.”
“Then fucking slam Liam like you should have done months ago. That’s your money!”
My sister was huffier than usual, but she was also right. “Yeah, I think I will. I’ve played nice for far too long. He can fuck off.” I was beginning to think he’d purposely stonewalled me.
“Good for you. But remember all men aren’t assholes. Like Alexsey.”
“Very funny.”
What the handsome Russian had done for us had been amazing, yet I was still angry with him. And why? Because my entire life I’d been successful providing for myself. Since my parents had been poor, I’d picked up the slack. Babysitting at twelve. A fast-food job at sixteen. Waitressing at eighteen. I’d helped provide for the household, which meant we’d been able to keep away from the seedier neighborhoods in Las Vegas.
Being married meant there’d been two incomes, which had allowed me to breathe. But I wasn’t involved with Alexsey. He was never going to become my knight in shining armor. Even if there was a tiny part of me, that girl who was in high school hoping her first love was her forever love, that wanted him to be.
Still infuriated with the circumstances, I tried to block out the sounds of the firehouse. At least the morning had been quiet. I’d missed a couple of days’ work. Thankfully, I had sick time banked up with the fire department, but bartending in a somewhat sleazy Irish bar hadn’t provided me with any benefits. Not that tips had been great lately, but every dollar counted.
