Page 62 of Thorns of Deceit
“Wh-what’s h-happ-ening?”
“Shhh.”
It was then that I heard them. Harsh voices echoing somewhere in the distance. Or were they close?
“You have to run,” she rasped in such a low voice that I wasn’t sure whether I was reading her lips or actually hearing her words.
“T-together?”
Her expression flashed with anguish and she shook her head, tears clinging to her eyelashes.
“No, you have to do this. It’s the only way. I’ll hold them back.”
Before she even finished her sentence, I was clawing at her hand. She must have moved to cover my mouth when the explosion went off.
“No, no. Together,” I breathed against her palm.
“I’m not going to make it, baby.” Her free hand clutched her side, and when she lifted it, crimson soaked every inch of her palm. I gasped, my eyes lowering to the spot she was holding, watching blood trickling out of her like water from a faucet.
Slowly, I lifted my head, seeing the destruction piled around me. It was like a scene from a nightmare.
Our apartment, or what was left of it, was unrecognizable. Reduced to a pile of rubble.
“Promise me you’ll live, Raven,” Mom whispered. “Stay away from the Callahans, and stay away from your father. They’ll destroy you.”
Her voice was filled with terror, her teary eyes spilling over to carve twin paths down her soot-covered cheeks.
I latched on to her hand, still loosely placed over my mouth. “I’m scared, Mom.”
“I know, but you’re strong. You’ll make it,” she whispered even as she trembled. “You found some good friends, hide behind them. Keep your head low. And live the way I couldn’t. O-okay? Don’t make the same mistakes I did, don’t turn to the bottle to dim your pain.”
I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tightly, feeling her wince. I shook against her, my face pressed against her neck as my heart thundered against my chest.
Sirens blared somewhere in the distance and suddenly voices neared us, speaking in a weird English accent.
Mom stiffened, a sob breaking through her lips. “They’re almost here.”
“Who?” I rasped, my eyes locked at the state of her—blood matting in her hair and cuts marking her once-beautiful face. A face that so resembled mine. She must have used herself as a shield to protect me.
“Your father’s men.”
I held my breath, a shriek bubbling in my throat. “Will he kill us?”
“I won’t let that happen.” She cupped my face gently, smoke and the coppery smell of blood seeping into my lungs. “He’ll think you died in the explosion. So will the Callahans. It’s your chance to start anew.”
“I don’t want to start anew without you,” I cried.
“You have to,” she urged, her lips losing their color by the minute. “Crawl toward the window,” she instructed, lifting herself off me. I slowly got to my knees. “You haven’t promised me you won’t go back to the Callahans. You can’t look back, baby, and you can’t seek out your father.” All I could do was tremble and whimper. “Promise me, Raven.”
“I promise, Mom.”
Then she pushed me forward with strength I didn’t know she had while I crawled through the rubble that used to be my life, leaving my mom behind.
I wished I hadn’t. I wished she would have come with me. And sometimes, I wished I died with her.
Was it shitty that I left Aiden thinking I was dead? Yes, probably, but my mother had lost her life because of me, and I refused to squander her sacrifice by going back.
It took me years to learn to stop looking over my shoulder after the explosion. I still lived with survivor’s guilt, still tormented myself thinking back to my final moments with her.
