Page 4 of Parker
I raise a brow. “That dress doesn’t come out on a Friday night for someone unimportant.”
“You’ve got me.” She smiles despite herself. “Remember that guy at work I told you about?”
I nod, remembering the way she lit up when she talked about him. Months of build-up, and I’d annihilated her big night.
“He finally asked me out. We were supposed to go to Carlo’s. But it’s fine. We rescheduled. He’ll still be single tomorrow.”
The guilt twists deeper. She’s been looking forward to this, and I ruined it without even trying. Typical Nicky, blindly careening through life, leaving destruction in her wake.
Exhaustion overwhelms me, and my head throbs from excessive drinking. After making an excuse, I escape to my room. It’s not really my room; it’s Sophie’s spare room, but it’s mine for now. After Joel and I separated, she was kind enough to offer me a place to stay, short term. That was months ago.
The room is pocket-sized. It’s the second bedroom in a modern, two-bedroom apartment in the city center. There’s enough space for a single bed, a chest of drawers, and a bedside table. That’s it. My clothes hang from every available hook, including the curtain rail and wall lights. Most of my belongings were put into storage when I finally cleared out my old home. There was nowhere to put them here. I really need to get my shit together and move out.
I need a job. I need a plan. I need… something.
Self-sabotage has become second nature. I scroll through old photos on my iPad. Joel and me at weddings, on vacations, silly selfies in the car. Smiling, arms around each other like nothing could touch us. We were so happy.
One night, I remember him coming in from work and sweeping me up into his arms. He told the music system to play Frank Sinatra, and we glided over the black-and-white tiles as if we were 1920s ballroom dancers. What we had was real, filled with sweet moments and heartfelt promises. It’s been too much to lose.
Even so, after all this time, he won’t admit it. Won’t admit what he did with her.
His childhood friend. His mother’s right-hand woman.
I toss the iPad aside and lie back, staring at the ceiling. My mind churns. We’re divorced. It’s done. There’s no going back. I signed the papers. I made it real.
Even when he tried to stop me. Lying scumbag.
A soft knock on my door breaks the silence.
“Come in,” I call, voice wavering.
Sophie pushes the door open and comes to sit beside me. I move over, leaving her space.
“Do you want to talk about what happened?” she asks gently. Hell, I love her. I don’t deserve her, but I love her.
“I went to the courthouse.” She nods, waiting, leaving space for me to speak. “I know I didn’t have to, but I thought… maybe it would give me closure. Only it didn’t. It made everything worse. I couldn’t breathe. So I left. And the only thing I could think to do was find a drink.”
Her gaze drops, the disappointment clear on her face.
“Over six years sober,” she whispers. “How could you throw that away, Nicky? Joel was beside himself when he called.”
I tense, surprised by her tone, almost scolding. “I didn’t ask him to come.”
Her eyes narrow. “Who else would get you?”
We stare at each other, the weight of that truth sinking between us. She’s all I have. And even she didn’t come.
“I’m sorry. Joel was already on his way when he called me.”
“It’s fine,” I lie. But it’s not. Having my ex-husband collect me from jail might be one of the most humiliating moments of my life. And that list is long. “I promise I’ll get my shit together,” I say. Sophie just nods. She’s heard it all before.
“No, really.” I push myself up, voice rising. “Tomorrow is a fresh start. Joel Parker can kiss my ass. The last six and a half years will not be a waste. The skills I learned in that family's business, they’ll be put to good use.”
Sophie bites her lip as if stopping herself from saying what she’s thinking. Her focus bounces between the ceiling and me.
“Just say it, Soph.”
“You won’t want to hear it.”
