Page 16 of Saint
I pick up the menus and go and place our order. When I get back, he’s chewing on the corner of his lip again, his bright blue eyes flicking from me to his drink to me again.
“You look like you’ve got something on your mind, you can talk to me or ask me anything.” I put my hand on hisforearm, he looks at it for a second, I wait for him to pull away. But he doesn’t, his eyes lift to mine, and it’s like he’s searching for something. “Talk to me, Noah.”
“Your dad said that we’re like ostriches or something because we have our heads buried in the sand.”
I sit back. That is not what I expected to hear. I thought it would be about Tate and Roman, that he has questions about them and me.
He looks at me shrewdly, expertly reading my expressions. “You thought I was going to ask about the friendly conversation I had with your two fuck buddies? You’re all adults, and it’s nothing to do with me.”
I can tell that he’s brushing it aside. I can read body language. As a Dom, I know what’s not being spoken aloud, but I can come back to that. I need to work out what my dad is on about.
“I’m gonna come back to that later. I don’t understand what you mean by ostriches?”
Noah’s head tips back, and his eyes close as he takes a deep breath before straightening up and looking at me again. “I’ve learnt in the time I’ve been living with your parents that they are open and honest about everything, and I mean everything. And on Sunday Robin decided to tell me that I had to recognise the submissive in me and accept that you’re a Dominant, and that we should work our shit out. Oh, and that we look at each other or something like that.”
It’s my turn to close my eyes. Bloody great! That’s all I need, meddling dads. “Shit, I’m sorry, Noah. He shouldn’t have said anything like that to you.”
“Is it true, though?” he asks, and I’m not sure which part he’s asking me to clarify. The fact that I watch him, that I’m a Dom, or that we’re perfect for each other. “Do you watch me? Are you interested in me?”
Now there’s a loaded question. But before I can answer, our food arrives, and by the time we’ve got everything we want, Noah has looked away from me. The interlude while we eat gives me time to think of an appropriate answer, and I think honesty is the only way to go. I am interested in him, very interested, but he’s too innocent to be introduced to the BDSM scene.
After Noah has eaten about half his burger, he puts it down and looks at me again. “Are you going to answer me, or is it ostrich time again?”
“Where’s this coming from? I’m your boss, of course I watch you.” I know I’ve said a dumb thing and when Noah rolls his eyes, I know he knows too.
“You weren’t my boss when we were at the gym, and you couldn’t stop watching me. You were pissed off with your two shiny toys, so I was thinking that maybe you do like me. Am I right?”
Okay, here goes nothing.
I wait while Saint finishes his burger, wipes his fingers on the napkin, then looks at me. “Eat your burger,” he says with a nod to the food on my plate. It was in the same voice he used to speak to his fuckbuddies, and it should piss me off. Instead, it causes butterflies to jitter about in my stomach. I do as he says.
He leans in close to me. I can feel his breath, warm against the shell of my ear. “Yes, Noah, I like you. You’re gorgeous and totally my type, but I am your boss, and that should be the only relationship between us. Y’see, I don’t do boyfriends. I don’t hold hands and cuddle under blankets, watching movies. Yes, I’m a Dom, and I like to spank, flog, whip my boys until they cry for more and beg for my cock. I like obedience. I like to have boys kneel at my feet, and I like to punish. I love to tease, torture, and objectify my playmates. And I don’t think you could handle even my softest kind of playing.” He tilts his head and nips at my earlobe, it’s sharp and painful and goes straight to my groin.
A gasp of pain slips free, but I don’t want to pull away. I want to feel anything he’ll give me. I think he wants me to make him stop, to prove that I’m not right for him. And maybe I’m not clued up in everything that happens in a sex club, but that doesn’t mean I’m not interested in what he’s told me. Maybeit’s the neglected child in me, the kid that’s used to hard knocks and rejection that makes me want him to do those things to me. Another way of proving I’m not worth anything to anyone.
But that’s not true anymore. I’m good at my work, I don’t owe anything to anyone. I have self-respect, and I know I’m worth something to me. I also realise that he’s provoking me, wanting me to push him away and tell him I’m not interested. I’m not ready for the things he’s talking about, but he must have had to learn how to do those things. So, that’s what I need to do. I need to let my submissive side free and try the things he likes. If he doesn’t want to do them with me, I can find someone else. Maybe Knox would take me to their club. I wonder what he likes.
“Have I shocked you?” He smirks, feeling pleased with himself.
“No, after what your fuck-friends told me about you, I was expecting it. I think you’re trying to scare me, so I’ll walk away from you. But all you’ve done is make me want to know more.”
He shakes his head. “You’re gorgeous, Noah, and I would like nothing more than to sink deep inside your body. But you deserve more, and I don’t want anything more. I don’t want a boyfriend. I don’t like to share my space, and that includes my bed, with anyone. That’s why I fuck boys like Tate and Roman, sometimes both together in a club. I can wash them off my body and sleep in my own bed.”
He picks up his pint and finishes it, setting it down heavily on the table. “Why now, Noah? Why so curious now? Are you just horny and thought you’d see if the boys were right?”
“Hey, don’t get shitty with me. You’re the one who keeps asking me what I’m thinking about. I told you, and you don’t like it. If you want to blame anyone, blame your dad.” I pull out mywallet and take a twenty-pound note out and put it on the table. “That will cover my meal.”
When I get outside, I roll my shoulders back, shaking out the tension that conversation caused. Bloody arrogant prick. I walked back down the street towards the taxi rank across the road, I can get a cab back to the house. I need to get my finances sorted, I need to learn to drive, and I need to find somewhere to live. Unless I live near the studio, then I don’t need to waste money on a car. I’ll start searching tonight. It doesn’t have to be glamorous or big, just a lock on the door and a comfy bed.
“Noah, stop!” Saint calls out to me, making me stop and turn.
He strides through the busy street as if there’s no one else around, coming to stop in front of me. He grabs me and presses his lips to mine. Right here on the street. His mouth is firm, his lips soft as he parts them to let his tongue seek entrance into my mouth. Instinctively, I open for him. I can taste the beer, but more than that, I can taste him. Dark and dangerous as he controls every angle of our heads and every sweep of his tongue against mine.
It's only when someone shouts, “Get a room!” that I’m released from the tight grip he has on my arms.
“What was that for?” I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand.
His smirk is back. “Was it that bad.” He nods towards my hand. “I don’t have fleas, I promise.”
