Page 108 of Stand: Part One
Her engagement ring was the only reason I’d discovered the truth in the first place. To have her disregard the ring’s significance so flippantly a second time brought all the rage I’d reserved for another day bursting back to the surface like an uncontrollable wildfire.
Jaden had earned her way back down here all on her own, and now she’d pay a heavy price for her admission back into the real world above.
Set on consistency, I stood and pulled off my suit jacket, laying it across the armchair, and released the restraints on Jaden’s wrists and ankles, noting the ice-cold touch of her skin. She slowly dragged her limbs into her body while I began to unbutton my shirt.
Pulling back the covers, I slipped into the bed and pulled her to me, turning her face into my bare chest like I’d always done before, and lifted the covers up to her shoulders. The second her skin met mine, a raging fire stormed through my blood, my touch the most basic method of branding what was mine.
Jaden sighed as she melted into me, burrowing into the warmth that my body offered, falling right back into our old pattern. To avoid putting too much pressure on her back, I carefully placed my arms around her, wrapping her shivering body in the comfort it desperately desired.
I hummed in satisfaction at the feel of her small frame against mine, the chill of her skin bringing me back to a time of complete domination and total submission. There was so much beauty in those days.
When you broke a person’s psyche, you couldn’t help but admire the process. When you witnessed their personality drain away, day by day, until there was nothing but an empty shell, you recognized the artistry involved.
Each move was carefully designed to rob them of free thought, of willfulness, until the only thing left was pure survival instinct. And then, you began to teach them exactly what survival looked like.
Survival was obedience. It was acceptance. It entailed responsibility and accountability. You became loyal to that method of survival, faithful in its protection from harm. It was the only thing you could rely on to keep yourself safe. So you followed it like it was the only map to your salvation, your only home.
And my wife was a master at survival.
Every day, Jaden found a way to survive me, to surpass what she once knew and adapt to each new trauma I scarred her with. How she did it, I may never comprehend, but a part of me believed it was almost entirely out of spite. And I had no problem refueling that tank every chance I got, just to see what she’d do next.
As often as she tried to piss me off almost every day, it paled in comparison to her ability to fascinate me with just a flick of her hair. No one had managed to captivate me the way she had.
And wasn’t that just her curse.
When Jaden finally stopped shivering and her skin was as warm as mine, I pressed my lips to the top of her head, reveling in the scent of her hair. “Stay here,” I said.
Reluctantly dragging myself away, I left her in the bed and headed into the bathroom to draw her a bath. After pouring in a generous helping of Epsom salt and bath oils, I watched it all dissolve and mix into the rising warm water.
Walking back into the bedroom, Jaden didn’t stir, her ears already tracking every sound I made so she would always know exactly where I was in the room and what I was doing. It was how she stayed prepared for my next move.
The atmosphere was volatile down here, the edge of madness just mere centimeters from our fingertips. Being unprepared was a sure way to spark that fragile line and detonate our world into pure chaos.
“Sit up,” I ordered, holding my palm out for her to take.
On a muffled groan, Jaden slowly raised her upper body from under the covers and reached out to place her small hand in mine. Offering her leverage, I helped her move into a sitting position, studying her facial features for the signs of the agony I knew she was hiding. She concealed it well, but I knew the damage I had done.
I snapped my fingers and pointed toward the bathroom. “You know the drill.”
Gripping the edge of the bed, Jaden clenched her jaw and then finally stood. She sucked in a sharp breath of air, but refocused her eyes on the bathroom just a few feet in front of her.
Abandoning my hand, she walked with purpose and without assistance straight for the doorway. But three steps in, her knee abruptly hit the ground, an anguished cry leaving her lips as she bared her teeth in a tight grimace.
I stood back and watched her collect herself, breathing through the pain as her chest heaved up and down, sucking down oxygen. I knew she could feel my expectant eyes on her, knew that despite her misery, she still had an order to follow.
So when she opened her eyes and forced herself to rise, I couldn’t deny the flare of pride in my chest as she marched her brutalized body through the doorway.
I allowed her a moment of privacy to relieve herself and brush her teeth, crossing the room to retrieve the pain medication from the locked cabinet inside the closet.
When I heard her slip into the tub, I took two pills from the container, grabbed another bottle of water and set everything on the bathroom counter where Jaden could clearly see them. Another unspoken transactional reward for her obedience.
She was huddled in the water, resting her cheek on her knees that were clenched tightly to her chest. Her eyes lingered over the rising water licking just below her shoulders, prompting me to turn off the faucet before it got too high.
Grabbing the pills, I placed them in my palm and held them in front of her to take. She carefully plucked the anti-inflammatories from my hand and placed them in her mouth, swallowing them back with the bottled water I gave her.
After removing the rest of my clothes, I stepped into the tub behind her and sat down, spreading my knees on either side of her body. Grabbing the bottle of body wash, I poured some into my palms and lathered them up until they were good and sudsy.
Carefully, like I was approaching an injured animal, I lightly placed my hands on the tops of Jaden’s shoulders and ran them down the lengths of her arms.
