Page 87 of Sapphire's Gem
Saxon looked after himself and boasted of a six-pack. I ducked my head and began licking and sucking his skin. All the while, I could taste and feel Wylde. Finally, three things hit me hard. One, Saxon wasn’t Wylde and never could take his place. Wylde had ruined sex for me with all other men. Two Saxon was still flaccid, obviously so, which confused me. And finally, Saxon was staring at me with a blank look on his face; he’d distanced himself from this.
“What the fuck?” I said and got off him.
“None of you women has ever treated me like a whore until today, Sapphire,” Saxon said, sitting up and buttoning his shirt.
Saxon watched me carefully as I recoiled at his words. Saxon kept his face impassive, and I couldn’t get a read on his emotions.
“That’s why you’re here, to service us,” I reported, digging my own grave.
“Yeah, with respect. What you just did bypassed all respect. I know my position in the club, and I’ve embraced it. Never been ashamed of what I did until now.”
“You’re ashamed?” I muttered as Saxon’s words hit me hard. Shit. What had I done?
“Yes.”
“Don’t be,” I replied finally as I sat down on the bed and dropped my head into my hands. Saxon was right. I’d treated him like meat. Sure, the guys were here to fuck us when we wanted it, but they were also respected and not spoken down to. That was a rule. Naturally, they got paid in the form of food, shelter, and an allowance. And they couldn’t refuse to fuck a sister unless there was a good reason. But I’d never treated one so callously. They were club sluts, but they also had feelings.
“What’s going on, Sapphire?” Saxon asked as he straightened his clothing and sat on the edge of his bed with me.
“I think I’m in love,” I muttered.
“Then why are you here with me?”
“Because a cop can’t live our life. And I wanted to fuck Hayden’s memory away,” I admitted.
“Didn’t work, did it?” Saxon said with a hollow laugh.
“Nope. I’m sorry for how I just treated you.”
“Yeah. I signed on to be in your stable, but not to be treated like a whore. Not gonna lie, it hurt coming from you. You need to sort your head out. Because you can’t fuck away the memory of someone you love,” Saxon stated with confidence.
“You’ve tried to?” I asked, and he nodded.
“Just before I came here, my long-time girlfriend cheated on me with my brother. I went off the rails. Not only did I lose my brother, but I also lost my home, friends, and family. They all took sides, and somehow, I was the one in the wrong. I’d been with her since we were fourteen—ten years—yet I lost everything.”
“You’ve never said anything, Saxon!” I exclaimed, surprised.
“Nope. I was hurting far too badly to discuss it when I arrived here. Luckily for me, you girls gave me a chance, and I’ve straightened myself out.”
“Are you happy, Sax?”
“Yes, believe it or not, this is a good life. And I know you women, if I want to leave, you’d wish me good luck and do your best to help me in my new life. I’m good with that.”
“Sax, you’re thinking of leaving?” I gasped. He was popular with the sisters, and I knew they thought a lot of him.
“Until just now, no, I wasn’t. What you just did, Sapphire, raises questions I need to think about,” Saxon replied.
I couldn’t hide my wince at the hurt in his eyes and voice. “I can’t apologise enough, Saxon.”
“No. You can’t. I felt violated just then. Saying no wasn’t an option because you’re the president. A fact I was well aware of. I suggest you sort your head out, Sapphire, because if it had been Blue or Cass, you’d have hurt them badly.”
Unable to deny Saxon’s words, I nodded.
“Please don’t leave, but if you do, put the responsibility where it belongs. On my shoulders,” I said, getting up.
“Oh, trust me, I will,” Saxon replied with a dark chuckle. I cupped his face and dropped a kiss on his forehead.
“You’ll never know how sorry I am,” I murmured and left.
