Page 56 of Dr. Roz Harrington
Sam didn’t answer. She couldn’t. Because as much as she wanted to believe Jack was right, that this wasn’t over, she wasn’t sure she could keep hoping for Roz to fight for her.
The quiet that followed Jack’s words felt heavier than the noise of the firehouse outside. Sam’s chest ached, and for the first time in days, she wasn’t sure she could keep it all inside anymore. She sank onto the bench that ran along the lockers, her head falling into her hands.
“I just—” She paused, her voice breaking slightly. “I don’t understand how she could let this happen. How she could let her mother have that kind of power over her. I thought… I thought we were more than that.”
Jack sat down beside her, staying quiet. Sam didn’t need anyone to fix it. She just needed someone to hear her.
“You weren’t just a fling, huh?” he said softly.
Sam let out a hollow laugh, wiping at her face roughly. “No. God, no. It wasn’t like that.” She paused, trying to gather her thoughts. “You know, at first, it was like we couldn’t stop clashing. She’s the most infuriating person I’ve ever met—arrogant, stubborn, impossible. But then…”
Jack waited, watching her closely.
Sam leaned back against the cold metal of the lockers, staring up at the ceiling as if she could find answers there. “Then she smiled. She looked at me a certain way, and I realized that underneath all the armor, there’s someone who cares so damn much it’s scary for her. I got to see that part of her, this softness she never shows anyone else. And I thought…”
“You thought you were safe with each other,” Jack finished quietly.
Sam nodded, pressing her lips together. “Yeah.”
The firehouse seemed to close in on her, the space where she had always been in control, where her leadership had alwayscome so naturally. But now? It all felt like it was falling apart. She could feel Jack’s eyes on her, waiting patiently for her to let it all out.
“She’s everything I didn’t know I wanted,” Sam admitted finally, her voice barely above a whisper. “And now she’s gone. Because of her goddamn family. Because her mother couldn’t stand the idea of her being happy with someone like me.”
Jack tilted his head. “Someone like you? What does that mean?”
Sam clenched her fists against her thighs, her jaw tight. “I’m not some fancy doctor. I don’t come from money or prestige or…any of that bullshit. I’m just me, Jack. A firefighter from a working-class family. And apparently, that’s not good enough for the Harringtons.”
Jack’s face softened, but his voice stayed firm. “Sam, you know that’s crap, right? This isn’t about you not being ‘good enough.’ It’s about her. About her being scared to stand up for herself.”
Sam shook her head, frustration spilling over. “But shecouldstand up for herself, Jack. She’s the strongest person I’ve ever met. In the OR? She’s fearless. She’ll take risks no one else will take because she believes in herself that much. But with this, with us, she folded. And I don’t know how to forgive her for that.”
Jack didn’t answer right away. He let her words hang in the air, unchallenged. Sam’s shoulders slumped as the weight of everything she’d said finally started to settle over her.
“I don’t think this is about forgiving her,” Jack said at last, his tone measured. “I think you’re afraid of how much this is hurting you. You put yourself out there, Sam. You let her in. And that’s not easy for someone like you.”
Sam scoffed, turning her head away. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
Jack gave her a knowing look. “You don’t let people in easily. You’ve always been the one taking care of everyone else—your team, your family, your friends. But Roz? She got close. Too close. And now you’re scared of how much she matters to you.”
Sam didn’t respond right away. She looked down at her hands, her thumbs absently running over the calluses on her palms. “It’s not fair,” she muttered after a long pause. “I gave her everything. And she just…shut me out.”
“Maybe she didn’t shut you out because she doesn’t care,” Jack said carefully. “Maybe she shut you out because she cares too much. Maybe that scares her more than anything.”
Sam frowned, her chest tightening at the thought.
Jack stood up, stretching his arms over his head before looking down at her. “Look, I don’t know Roz. But I know you. And I know you wouldn’t feel this way if it wasn’t real.”
Sam looked up at him, her eyes tired and weary. “Then why didn’t she fight for me, Jack? Why didn’t she fight for us?”
Jack just gave her a small, supportive smile. “Maybe you’ll have to be the one to make her see it’s worth fighting for.”
Sam let out a breath, heavy and slow, as Jack turned to leave. Before he stepped out of the room, he paused, glancing back at her.
“Take it easy on yourself, Cap,” he said. “You’re not as alone as you think.”
Sam watched him go, the door creaking softly as it shut behind him. For a long time, she stayed there, sitting at her desk, staring at nothing. Jack’s words echoed in her mind.
The thought sent a fresh wave of emotions crashing over her. Roz had let her walls go back up, but Sam still saw her. She saw the fear beneath Roz’s anger, the hurt beneath her silence. And that was the part that cut the deepest, because Sam knew she still loved her. Despite everything.
