Page 75 of The King's Sword
“And why is that?” She tilted her head to the side, watching him.
“Because if I have nothing that I treasure, it can’t be taken away or used against me.”
The room suddenly felt oddly silent. Sabine blinked, processing what he’d revealed. Sadness filled her. He lived the life of not only a royal, but an assassin. She understood how his enemies would and could use things he loved and cared for against him. Her room in Bakley was filled with items she cherished. Flowers she’d saved, books she’d read, jewelry she owned. Clothes, shoes, letters, rocks, and trinkets. The urge to hug him inundated her, and she had to look away. “I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is.” He shrugged. “My fate is sealed. There’s no point trying to change it. Or be upset.”
His statement mirrored her own feelings.
She hesitated a moment before going over and sitting on the bed next to him. “Sometimes I start to think about thewhat ifs…but then I stop myself. There’s no point in thinking about things that cannot be.” This was the most honest she’d been with anyone since her sister.
He folded his hands, his focus on them as they rested in his lap. He nodded slowly. “Tell me one of yourifs.”
Thinking over the manywhat ifs, she picked a safe one. “What if my sister never died?”
At that, he turned his head, looking at her. He slid his right hand to her back. “I’m sorry she died.”
So was Sabine. “Now tell me one of yourifs,” she whispered.
His eyes never left hers. “What if I never act on the one thing I’m too afraid to?”
“You don’t strike me as the sort of man who’s afraid of anything.”
With his free hand, he reached up and cupped her cheek. “I’m afraid of losing your friendship.”
She didn’t think they’d be able to remain friends once she returned to Lynk. “What’s the one thing you’re afraid to do?” Her heart thudded in her chest as if she’d just run across the field behind her parents’ castle back home.
His eyes focused on her lips. “I wish I’d kidnapped you before you married Rainer.”
“That’s not awhat if,” she said, her voice coming out all breathy.
“What if I kidnapped you before you married Rainer?”
Even though the ceremony had been performed, Sabine and Rainer hadn’t consummated their marriage. She abruptly looked away from Evander, wondering, if only for an instant, if she truly was married. She abruptly stood. These thoughts had no place in her, and they had to stop.
“Sabine?” Evander said, standing and coming up behind her. “Is something wrong?”
She could feel the heat of him behind her. If she tilted back, she would lean into him. Closing her eyes, she imagined all the ways she wanted to be with him. Then she shook her head. “Nothing is wrong,” she finally replied. “I just had anotherwhat ifmoment.” She took a step away from Evander before turning to face him, a forced smile on her lips.
“Care to share?” His eyes kept focusing on her lips.
She knew he felt the same way about her that she felt for him. “I can’t,” she whispered.
He took a step closer to her, his eyes searching hers. “What if you could? What if we only have this moment in time together?” he asked, his voice coming out soft and husky.
She didn’t know how to respond to that.
“What if, just for tonight, we don’t think about what we should be doing or what our duties are. What if we just feel?”
Her heart pounded as she searched his eyes, trying to understand what he was suggesting.
ChapterTwelve
“What are you saying?” Sabine asked.
“Maybe we should forego thewhat ifsand just do.” Evander slid one hand around the back of her neck, his intense eyes never straying from hers. “Just once in my life, I’d like to do something I want. I want this, and I want it with you.” His other hand reached forward, untying the fabric belt around her waist.
Desire bloomed inside her. She closed her eyes, easily imagining him removing the rest of her clothes. The feel of his hand sliding over her skin. His lips trailing along her neck. Her hands exploring his body. She opened her eyes. “It doesn’t matter what we want,” she said, her voice coming out breathy. “We have a duty that is bigger than us, our wants, and our desires.”
