Page 71 of Puck You
“It’s about us,” she responded, leaning down to brush a soft kiss against my lips, “and I had to remind you that I’m good with my mouth as well.”
“Feel free to remind me whenever you want.”
Grace chuckled as she reached for her discarded clothes and began to dress.I knew what was coming next.She was going to leave, and as much as I wanted to ask her to stay, I refused.Not after her insistence that we keep things casual.Grace wasn’t ready to trust me.She needed more time.
“Are you okay?”I asked, unable to help myself.I had to know if she was already regretting her decision.The last time we’d slept together, Grace had fled the scene before I was fully dressed.
“I’m better than okay,” she insisted, squeezing my hand in assurance.
I forced myself to remain cool, calm, and collected despitethe growing turmoil inside me.Grace could make the decision to end this at any time, but I was already well into the deep end.Now that I’d had another taste of Grace, there was no going back.
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Grace
Sebastian insisted on walking me home.Though the sidewalks were hard to traverse, the roads had been plowed serval times over.We didn’t speak the whole way.A calm had settled over campus in the wake of the storm, and neither of us seemed eager to break through the peaceful quiet.After a lingering kiss along the side of my neck, Sebastian said goodbye.A giddy smile curved my lips as I stumbled up the stairs, blissfully ignorant of the interrogation awaiting me.With a nudge of my hip, I pushed open the door and stepped into the apartment.A deafening silence greeted my ears.Caroline and Lydia were perched on the couch, the former watching me with a wary expression as I slipped off my winter gear and eased myself into the living room.The examination began almost at once.
“Liar, liar, pants on fire,” Caroline sang in greeting.
And just like that, my post-sex euphoria evaporated.
“I wonder,” she continued, “have you and Sebastian been canoodling since the night of his birthday, or has this been going on for longer?”
Lydia shook her head, evidently embarrassed by her best friend’s dramatics.
“Did you just use the wordcanoodle?”I couldn’t help myself, and I was desperate to ease some of the tension ladeningthe room.
“You do not get to avoid my question!And yes, I used the wordcanoodle.I could have asked how long you’ve been having dirty sex—”
“Okay,” Lydia said, interrupting Caroline’s clear attempt at role-playing her future career as a litigator.“Let’s have a grown-up conversation about this.Grace, that begins with you telling us about Sebastian.”
This wassonot how I’d wanted to end my night.Not only had I endured an hour-long motivational talk from Sam on the drive back to school, but I was emotionally exhausted from being vulnerable with Sebastian and physically exhausted from everything that came after.The only thing that sounded better than sleep was a long, hot bath paired with a podcast.
“You can start by telling me what happened at Sebastian’s birthday party,” Caroline prompted, as if she could sense an excuse was about to fly out of my mouth.
“We kissed.And then I pushed him into the lake.”
“So that’s why he was wet,” Lydia mused at the same time as Caroline asked, “That’s all?I need more details.How was the kiss?Why did you push him in the lake?”
I had a feeling it was going to be a while until I got to bed.
“You can trust us.You know that, right?”Lydia’s voice was soft, as if she were trying to convey the sincerity behind her words.
I did trust them—as least, I wanted to—but I wasn’t used to talking about this stuff with anyone other than Sam.I’d never been close with my roommate in Boston.She was my biggest competition on the team, which meant we were always pitted against one another, and when our coach moved me to the firstline, things only got worse.Matt had a reputation as a player back then, and my roommate made it known that I was just another puck bunny on his roster.I was accustomed to people judging me for who I associated with.Growing up, everyone had treated me differently when they found out my mom was in a mental facility.No one had wanted to be friends with the girl whose mother was “insane.”Sam was the only friend who'd stuck by my side after the news spread.
“I was worried you might judge me for wanting him after everything that happened at the start of the season,” I admitted, forcing words out despite my every instinct.“And then I convinced myself that sleeping with him was a mistake, one that would never happen again, so it didn’t make sense to tell anyone.I’m sorry.I know I should have said something, but I was so confused about my own feelings.”
“I’m not mad, I just wish you would have been honest with me,” Caroline said.
“And it’s not like we couldn’t tell there was tension.You guys have been eye-fucking each other at lunch for weeks,” Lydia added.
I shook my head in embarrassment.“I’m an idiot, and I’m not good at opening up.It takes me a while to feel comfortable enough to share the more private parts of my life, and everyone usually gives up before I get there.”Another thought struck me less than a second later.“Wait, how did you guys find out?”
Lydia visibly shuddered as she said, “I heard you two at it in the women’s locker room.”
Oh.My.God.Nothing could stop the rush of humiliation that doused my entire body in heat.I was seconds away from bursting into flames.
“I don’t even know what to say.”I stared down at my hands as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.“I’m mortified that you overheard us.”
