Page 75 of Till Death Us Do Part: Book 2
“I think not! I am here for business and the occasional good works.”
“How so?” Darcy asked, genuinely curious about what type of business could be performed in that setting.
“Who is the best hunter—the one who takes his hounds, traps, and guns out actively seeking his prey; or the one who dumps a bit of bait on the ground, and sits around waiting to see if one wanders by?”
Darcy chuckled. “You and your analogies! Very well, I will bite and believe you are here to drum up business in some way I am unaware of.”
“Correct. Shall I walk you through it?”
Amanda swept her hand around to indicate the room at large.
“It is obvious. Bored men can think of any number of things, and books are one of those. Get them thinking about reading, and some will come in for a purchase, especially if you can describe a story with some excitement without giving it away. Can you imagine any place in the world with a higher density of bored men than an assembly hall? All those fathers, uncles,and brothers who would much rather beanywhereother than protecting their daughters, nieces, and sisters.”
Darcy had to chuckle. “When you put it that way, I must agree. I did my duty to my sister, and I can see merit in your argument, because it was sometimes tedious beyond belief. Fortunately, she is well married now, so it will be some years before I take up the yoke again.”
His laugh turned rueful, and then to a frown. “I first encountered my late wife in an assembly hall much like this. It was in a small town in Hertfordshire. I was in bad humour and acted even worse. I slighted her before we had even been introduced.”
Amanda raised an eyebrow. “I suggest you discontinue that practise. It seems counterproductive.”
“I learned my lesson and abandoned it years ago.”
Amanda seemed thoughtful herself. “I used to love assemblies when I was younger. I still enjoy the occasional dance, but they are not magical like they once were. I imagine they are not the drudgery you feel they are, but not wonderful either.”
“You said you are here for businessandgood works?”
“Yes, let me finish my tale of business. I also wander about the hall, and if I see a bit of lace, a sleeve, or something else I find interesting, I might mention I have seen similar in a fashion magazine. I get a few matrons and maidens the following week. Not much profit in that, I admit, but they enjoy the process so much I feel honour bound to guide them towards their guilty pleasure.”
Darcy laughed. “Guilty pleasure, indeed.”
Amanda just shrugged and smiled.
“Tell me about these good works if you are of a mind to do so. I have found doing good works to be one of my greatestpleasures in life, and I now dedicate a sizeable portion of my time and income to it.”
Amanda looked around as if disclosing a deep dark secret that she did not want to be overheard.
“It is nothing, really. You see, there are certain types of young men who would like to ask a young lady to dance but lack the fortitude. You can no doubt jump a six-foot hedgerow, but I assume you must have started with a branch, and worked your way up?”
“Yes, I believe so.”
“Young men often have their mother, aunts, sisters, ormaybeoccasionally a dance instructor or cousin to practise on. Unfortunately, unless they are very brave, the gap between that and a girl you might like can seem insurmountable—herculean even. That is where I come in. I am well known as a widow of middling age, thoroughly uninterested in matrimony. To such a young man, I would seem as safe as his grandmother, but much closer in age and beauty to the one he is interested in. I can act as a stepping-stone, someone safe to practise with. I get a dance with a nice young man with no expectations, and he gets to see what it is like dancing with someone who is not a relative. I might even suggest topics of conversation he might employ or avoid. Everybody benefits.”
Darcy just stared, wondering if this was a common occurrence among women, or if Mrs Thorne had invented the practise. It all made sense, and if it were common, he would never have known. In his analogy, being the heir to Pemberley, he was expected to go from the tree branch to the hedgerow in a single dance.Everythingwas loaded with meaning in a dance in his earlier life. Every request for a set, smile, or even just conversation felt as if it were being dissected for meaning and matrimonial intent before the first dozen words were spoken. Hefound it exhausting, while others, like Richard or Bingley, rode the beast with hardly a second thought.
He finally said, “That may be the nicest thing I have ever heard.”
She laughed. “Thank you for the compliment, though its veracity is suspect.”
Darcy chuckled along with her, and they both looked around as they heard the musicians warming up for dancing.
She said, “We have established that our purposes are not the same, unless of course you are here scratching for customers for your estate’s wool, so I do believe you have not answered my original question. What are you doing here, if it is not too impertinent to ask?”
“Following your instructions, of course.”
A thoroughly confused Amanda asked, “Which instructions are those?”
Darcy retrieved a small paper from his vest. “Here it is, I wrote it down.”
He held the note in front of him and read. “Step 1: Go to a ball. Step 2: Dance with a woman. Step 3: Converse with said woman. Step 4—”
