Page 76 of Till Death Us Do Part: Book 2
Amanda cut him off. “I may have been overly influenced by the wine that night. Your marital status is none of my business, and you hardly need instruction.”
Darcy grinned somewhat evilly and asked, “Are you implying this is a bad plan? I hope not. I wrote the steps down at once… well… almost. I wrote them down as soon as I got out of bed and took enough of my man’s vile concoction to feel slightly human again. It is not as good as my old valet’s was, but good enough. I took a bath, drank four cups of coffee, andthenwrote it down. I am quite certain it is accurate.”
Amanda had a tough time not falling into a fit of giggles, but she kept them to a manageable level.
When they were done laughing, she said, “Let me see this list.”
He handed it over, so she examined it and commented, “The list is good, but this is just an outline. You are supposed to fill in the details. For example, when I said, ‘ball’, I meant ‘ball’, not ‘public assembly.’ I am quite literal, you know.”
Darcy looked around. “Are you implying there are no eligible women here?”
“Not at all! There may be a few, but the hunting would be much better at a private ball.”
Darcy pouted a bit. “Noted—but since I am here, I believe I will proceed with Step 2.”
Amanda glanced and saw that was‘Dance with a woman’, so she said, “That at least will be good practise, I suppose. Who is to be your first victim?”
“You, of course.”
“Me?” Amanda yelled, gasping and coughing in surprise.
“Yes,you! Who else?”
“Who else indeed? You know perfectly well that ‘dance with a woman’ means ‘dance with amarriageablewoman’. That is why I suggested a private ball. If you are following those suggestions, then you need to dance with women of your own station.”
“I am a gentleman; you are a gentleman’s daughter; so far we are equal.”
“True. I am a gentleman’s daughter, but in case you had not noticed, Iwasa lady. Now I am a tradeswoman, two entire social classes below you, and that does not even count the fact that I am a woman doing a man’s work. Not to mention that I would not bring any real dowry, or a single worthwhile connexion—except Miriam, of course.”
“Bah! I once thought in those terms, and it did naught but poison my soul. You are my equal, if not my superior.”
Darcy wondered why it was so blasted hard to get women he liked to dance with him, while women he didnotlike had been clamouring for his attention for fifteen years. He remembered he had asked Elizabeth for a dance three or four times before she acquiesced at the Netherfield ball. Even then, he later learned, she did it only because she did not want to give up dancing for the rest of the evening. That, however, was not a topic he wanted to explore further.
Undaunted, Amanda ignored his reply. “Perhaps, I did not adequately explain the details of my ‘remain a widow’plan.”
“Meaning?” Darcy asked, exasperated.
“Meaning, sir, that I am notindifferentto the idea of matrimony. Marriage is not something that I could take or leave. I amactively opposed. Ido not want to remarry.”
Darcy snapped back, “You said you might wed again some time—” but then paused in confusion.
Amanda felt sorry the whole conversation was going so badly. “I apologise if I was unclear, so let me be explicit. I do not want to marry again any time soon, and if I ever did—”
She paused, unsure of herself, and Darcy observed what seemed a vulnerability he had never noticed. Mrs Amanda Thorne mostly seemed as tough as old shoe leather, but something about this conversation was paining her to the point where he noticed her gripping her hands together tight enough to draw blood to keep them from shaking. Darcy kicked himself, wondering if he would ever in his life get an important conversation with a woman he liked right. So far, his success rate was dismal.
She finally sucked in a breath and continued, “I appreciate the honour of your brief consideration. I really do! I hope this will not affect our friendship, but you must understand something.” She took another breath. “I willnevermarry a man of your standing. If I marry, it will be to someone of minormeans, who needs me as much as I need him. You do notneedme and never will. I daresay you are flirting with the idea ofwantingme, but you will neverneedme. I cannot put myself under the control of such a powerful man—never again. It is just something I cannot do.”
Darcy wondered who the bounder was who made Mrs Thorne so reticent. One thing was obvious. He was a high-status individual, who was at least as bad a husband as Darcy had been. He might even be someone the gentleman knew. It could easily have been a friend or acquaintance. He had never been the most social fellow in the ton, and there was no telling how many minor acquaintances were jettisoned by his mind during his bout with typhus. Of course, he could have been a rich banker or tradesman just as well as a gentleman, so it was all speculation. Either way, Mrs Thorne seemed to have an unbreakable aversion to high-status men, which was either unfortunate or challenging.
He asked very gently, “Did he hurt you badly? Do I pain you by speaking this way?”
She sighed, looked at him intently for a moment, then slumped her shoulders. “Circumstanceshurt me. I will say no more about my husband—now or ever. That is a boundary I will not cross.”
Darcy bowed. “I will respect the boundary, Amanda.”
Neither noticed that he had slipped and called her by her given name, and it is uncertain what either would have thought about it if they had. They both stood silent, frowning ferociously, with no idea where to look after the altercation.
Darcy finally smiled in what he thought was a non-threatening way.
