Page 30 of Make You Wish You Were Dead
"Morning," he says softly.
I nip at my lip and walk more inside the kitchen. "Hi."
"Did you sleep good?" Rowan asks as he looks back at the food he is cooking.
"Yes," I answer as I sit down on the stool at the island. "Did you?"
"I slept good. For the first time in a while to be honest," Rowan says and when he looks at me, I see a small sparkle or glint of something in his eyes. "It was nice to hear your voice yesterday, fawn. You have a beautiful voice that everyone should hear."
"Thank you," I say quietly.
"Don't thank me. It's the truth." Rowan turns the stove off and puts the food on the plate. "And someday other people will be able to hear you." Panic fills my body as I think about talking to other people other than Rowan. "Don't think about it too much. I don't expect you to start mouthing kids off at work today or in a few months. I know it will take time but that's why I am here to help you." Rowan is now standing next to me, and he puts the plate of food in front of me.
I look up at Rowan. "Don't tell my parents. I don't want them or anyone else knowing."
"I won't," he says softly. "Are you going to tell Thalia?" I shrug my shoulders. I want to but I don't want to hurt her by only talking to Rowan. "I'll be in the car when you’re ready," Rowan says before leaving me alone in the kitchen.
After I finish eating my breakfast I go to my room to change into clothes for me to wear to work.
I put on a pair of grey leggings and just kept the black sweater I had on. I throw my hair in a bun and then grab my bag before going downstairs to the car.
When I get inside the car, Rowan turns his head to look at me which makes me smile at him.
He doesn't smile but I don't think anything of it because he isn't the type to smile at all.
He reminds me of a corpse or something.
Emotionless.
"Ready?" he asks once I close the door, and I nod my head. He starts the engine and then drives out of the driveway. "So, anything new at work?" Rowan asks.
I'm a little surprised that he is asking a lot of questions because usually in the car he won't talk at all or even when we are just sitting next to each other doing nothing he won't ask me anything even though I could have signed to him.
He probably just likes to talk rather thantryingto understand what I sign to him.
I gulp and then say, "It’s good. Today Katlyn and I are going to have the kids write their own stories. She said it’s a good way for them to express their feelings through a form of writing."
"Sounds fun. Do you like writing? I see you with your notebook a lot."
"I only carry around a notebook with me if I need to talk to someone who doesn’t know sign language. I like reading more."
"How many books do you think you’ve read?" Rowan looks at me and I can see a small smile threatening to form on his lips.
A smile lifts on my face. I love to read. I used to read a lot of books when I was fifteen or sixteen years old but then I stopped. When I had my accident, I started reading again and I would finish a book in under a day because I loved reading that much.
Reading was something that made me feel like life was okay, even for only five hours. I wasn’t Jane Reyes.
I wasn’t the girl who went through something traumatic.
I was Lana, Glyndon, Ember, Alexis, Willow, and I was falling in love with so many different storylines about love.
"It's hard to say. More than two hundred and less than four hundred."
"I can tell you like reading." Rowan stops the car at a red light, and he looks at me.
The heat of his stare makes me feel a pulse between my legs that I have never felt before and I can’t help but press my thighs together and mess with the sleeve of my sweater.
Why does he have this kind of effect on me?
