Page 29 of Make You Wish You Were Dead
I would probably go down on my knees to hear Jane say my name.
"When was the last time you talked?"
"Last time I talked to someone was three years ago and the last time I talked in front of a mirror to myself was two years ago." This girl kept her mouth shut for two years? Just knowing that she is talking to me and no one else right now makes me feel important and a little possessive but also curious as to why. "I don't know why I can only talk to you. It's frustrating me but after I yelled at you and left the car I stood in front of the mirror and started ranting about you to myself. I then tried to call Thalia, but nothing happened."
"What's the difference between Thalia and I?"
"So many differences. If anything, I should be comfortable talking to her, not you," she confesses. "For some reason I can only talk to you."
"That's a good thing," I tell her.
"No, it's not Rowan. It's actually the worst thing that could happen to me."
"I’m sorry for saying those things to you earlier. It was out of line."
"I know why you did it. You wanted a reaction. I know that getting my voice back wasn’t going to be easy but the way you went about it worked."
Bringing Jane's voice back wasn't going to be easy, and I knew that but each day she is taking a small step to come back to being a social person and not someone who stays in the shadows.
I was there the night Jane had her accident, but no one knows what happened except Jane. Jane is the reason I learned to do sign language because whether she knew it or not.
I have a few ideas of what might have happened but only Jane knows.
"What happened three years ago to make you not want to talk anymore?"
It is quiet again for a few seconds but then she speaks making my heart rate increase by a little.
"I don't know. I want to know but that whole night turned into a faded dream. I'm trying to figure out what exactly happened."
"I will help you. Every step of the way fawn."
Fifteen
Jane
This morningI woke up feeling lighter. I don't know why.
Maybe the reason is because Rowan and I talked last night, and I had my first real conversation in three years.
With Rowan out of all people.
After Rowan said he would help me we both just stayed on the phone and then I ended up falling asleep.
I woke up seeing my homescreen, so I don't know if we stayed on the phone the whole night or not.
Right now, I'm in the bathroom looking at myself in the mirror, finding the courage to go downstairs and face Rowan cause I know he is there.
But I'm so nervous to go downstairs.
I can do this.
I throw on a hoodie before leaving my room. When I enter the kitchen, I see Rowan in front of the stove cooking eggs in a pan and bacon in another.
My stomach makes a noise as I smell the bacon from across the room.
Rowan turns his head and the look he gives me is soft and almost gentle as he trails his eyes all over my body making me feel heat in my stomach.
God.
