Page 52 of Unspoken Words
“If I have to.”
Lilah raised her leg, exposing a bunch of small cut-like scars on her upper thigh through the frayed rips and holes of her jeans. She caught me gawking and covered them with the palm of her hand.
“What happened?” I asked, nodding toward her thigh.
She rubbed the area as if to try and rub them away. “Nothing.”
“Doesn’t look like nothing.”
Sighing, she moved her hand and reached for her rich brown ponytail, twirling it repeatedly with her fingers. “I guess my doctor’s response would be something along the lines of ‘anger redirected’, but I … I haven’t quite figured out what or why yet. I’m still working on it.”
Her response was sincere and one I could relate to because not all questions had answers, especially ones so raw and personal. But I couldn’t help but wonder if she still felt whatever it was that made her cut herself in the first place.
“Have you stopped?” I asked, nodding to her thigh again.
She nodded back, her dangling leg swinging back and forth.
“That’s good.”
Lilah scoffed. “Why do you even care?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“Because I mean nothing to you.”
“What? I wouldn’t say that. We’re friends, aren’t we?”
“I guess so.”
“Then you do mean something.”
This was a side of Lilah I’d never seen: an unsure, self-conscious, sad side. A side she hid behind her heavy makeup and gothic clothing.
“Fine,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Yes, I’ve stopped cutting. I stopped after we moved here.” She picked at the frayed denim. “Actually, I stopped before we moved here.”
“So why did you move here? What happened at your old school?”
“Ah … so youhaveheard the rumours then.” A proud glint appeared in her chocolate eyes followed by a devilish smile, but it didn’t stay there long, her face still, her stare fixed to the ground.
“I have heard a rumour or two, yes, but that’s all I ever assumed they were … rumours.”
“Go on then, fess up. What have you heard?”
“That you flashed your teacher.”
“And do you believe it?” She glanced up, waiting for my answer.
“I don’t know enough to believe it or not.”
“Well, you should believe it because it’s true; I did flash my science teacher.”
I scratched my head. “Why?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“No.”
“To show him my perfect tits, why else?” Lilah proudly cupped them in her hands and winked.
