Page 50 of Unspoken Words
“They’d visit, and we’d visit them.”
She smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Okay. No. Wait! What if one of us gets in and the other doesn’t? What then?”
“We cross that bridge if and when we come to it.”
The lines in her brow slowly smoothed, her eyes once again glittering. “You’re right.” She twisted the hem of my t-shirt, her fingers skating across my abdomen. “You know,” she said, teeth clamping her bottom lip. “There’s also a course in Canberra I’ve been looking at. The university is not far from the National Institute of Sport …” She paused, her eyes searching mine. “If you started practising again, you could apply for a basketball scholarship, but only if you wanted—”
“I don’t,” I said, my response sharp and swift. I shifted beneath her, prompting her to get off my lap. “And anyway, you seem to forget I haven’t played in years. I wouldn’t be any good.”
Standing up, I choked down my disappointment at her bringing up something she knew I wanted buried. Basketball was dead to me; it died when Aaron did. I’d told her so time and time again and, yet, she wouldn’t let it go. Ellie was persistent at the best of times, a quality I admired and thought annoying although cute, but her persistence where playing basketball was concerned irritated the hell out of me. It had absolutely nothing to do with her. But it was Good Friday, and the last thing I wanted was to argue, so, holding my hands out to her, I changed the topic. “I smell hot cross buns. Please tell me you smell them too.”
She took hold of my hands and let me lift her to her feet, chagrin in her eyes that did not go unnoticed, only unaddressed. “Yeah, I smell them. Let’s hope they’re fruitless ones unlike last year.”
The memory of Chris and Ellie flicking sultanas they’d plucked from their hot cross buns at each other shot to the forefront of my mind, and I couldn’t help but laugh. Several had landed in Ellie’s forest of curls, and one in a vase on a shelf in their dining room.
“Well, I’ve got ya back … just in case they’re not fruitless.” I ran my fingers through her beautiful hair.
She closed her eyes for the smallest of seconds and then kissed my cheek. “And I’ve got yours. Always.”
*
Ellie’s Aunt,Uncle, and littlecousins arrived shortly after breakfast, and Mrs Mitchell had avoided another hot cross bun war by making both fruit-filled and fruitless varieties. She was a great cook and was preparing a seafood barbeque lunch before Ellie and I were to head to my place for dinner.
We’d stepped outside to play with the kids and keep them out of Mrs Mitchell’s hair.
“Ball! Ball!” Thomas demanded, his chubby toddler hands outstretched and waiting.
“A ball?” Ellie asked him. “Where?” She pivoted in her driveway, her short, floral dress spinning with her, the sun’s rays illuminating her hair as she twirled. She looked adorable.
Thomas pointed at me.WTF? Last time I checked, I was human.
I pointed to me too. “Me? I’m not a ball, little dude.”
Ellie laughed and jogged toward the love swing I was sitting on. “It’s underneath you, you dork. Can you please grab it for me?”
“Sure.” I leaned forward and peered between my legs, spotting a basketball within arm’s reach. Blood rushed to my head, and I quickly convinced myself it was because I was upside down and not because I hadn’t touched a basketball in years, so I stretched my arm and inched it toward me with my fingertips, deliberately rolling it to Ellie so I wouldn’t have to pick it up. Unfortunately, I missed my mark and it rolled past her.
“Thanks.” She huffed and went to retrieve it then paused and looked back at me. “Hey, why don’t you help me teach Tom how to shoot hoops? He’d love it.”
I shook my head. “Na, you’ve got this.”
“Come on. It’ll be fun.”
“NO, Ellie.”
She rolled her eyes and murmured, “It’s just a goddamn ball” before turning and bouncing the ball with force on her way back to Tom who was waiting patiently under the ring.
The sound of leather smacking concrete shot through me like a bullet, followed by the next bounce and the next, my body warm and alert. In the past, I would’ve seized up and frantically searched within for a song to drown out the incessant noise, but as time had passed so too had my heightened levels of anxiety. Instead of closing down, I sucked in a deep breath and willed my memories laced with grief to subside, something that was now easier but no less painful, and although I’d found strength over the years to push past most of the pain by acknowledging Aaron’s death, I sure as fuck didn’t want to reacquaint myself with the memories for the sole purpose of entertaining a two-year-old boy.
“Say cheeeeeeeese!”
Ellie’s cousin, Corinne, slowly came into focus when she stepped in front of me, a toy camera covering her face. She made a clicking sound and then handed me a pretend photograph.
“Thank you.” I accepted thin air and appraised it. “Good job.”
She giggled and skipped off just as the basketball came bouncing my way, landing on the seat beside me.
“Connor!” Ellie called out. “Chuck it here.” Her hands were splayed in a catch position, her eyes wide and victorious.
