Page 49 of Emma
“You’ve been in contact with Freya.”
Vanessa rose to her feet but didn’t move far. She lingered by the edge of the couch, while Emma remained standing just inside the room, rooted in place. Emma looked to her, and Vanessa gave her a single nod to continue.
“I… It’s not what you think. I had no idea who Freya was.” Emma wrung her hands as she shifted in place a little. “And I know this isn’t what you expected, I’m just as shocked as you appear to be, but Freya came to me.Shetoldme.”
Carmen’s brow rose as surprise flickered in her eyes. “S-she told you? How could she possibly know who you are? We didn’t know you existed, so how could she?”
Emma chanced another step into the room and took a seat. “All I know is that my parents used to talk about me around her a lot. At least, that’s what Freya told me when she came to my office that day.”
Carmen scoffed. “Yet you didn’t think to take her when her parents…yourparents couldn’t look after her?”
Emma’s shoulders sagged with the weight of that comment. “I didn’t know I had a sister. Until last week, I was an only child.”
“You really expect me to believe you?” Carmen glared at Emma from across the room. “How can you not know you have a sibling?”
“Because…” Emma paused, realising she would have to explain herself and her past if there was any hope of Carmen believing her. “I’ve been estranged from my parents for a long time. I left home at sixteen, moved in with a relative, and then got my own place as soon as I could afford to.” Though it may have been tough in the beginning for Emma, it had stillbeen the best decision she’d made. If she’d stayed in that toxic environment, God only knew where she would be right now. “I took care of myself, I went to university, and I worked hard to be someone theyhadn’traised.”
Carmen softened a little, but Emma knew this would take a lot of time.
“I don’t see or speak to my parents or any of my family. I didn’t even know my mum had moved out of the area until I contacted her last week, hoping to find out the truth. Once I knew, once she’d confirmed that I do, in fact, have a sister… All I wanted was to turn back time so I could take Freya from her and look after her. If I’d known, Carmen, I would have done anything to protect her from the upbringing I had.”
Carmen stiffened at that.
“When Freya came to my office and told me, I didn’t confirm anything. I was too stunned. I thought she was mistaken, but then she started talking about our parents, Jane and Will, and asked why I hadn’t been given new parents the way she had.”
Emma looked back at Carmen, but she was giving nothing away at all.
Fuck.
“To this day, I haven’t spoken to her outside of P.E. lessons. In fact, I’ve tried to avoid seeing her in the corridors as much as I possibly could. I just…” Emma swallowed down the emotion in her throat when her voice broke. Vanessa sat beside her and took her hand, squeezing it in support. “I can’t face her. The way she was looking at me that day…I can’t face another one of those conversations until I know what is and isn’t allowed. Because now that I know the truth, Icannotlie to her. She deserves so much more than that.”
“She didn’t tell us,” Carmen said, her voice shaking. “Not a word.”
“I promise I haven’t said anything since,” Emma said. “Not to her. Not even to anyone else at school. The day the headteacher called me to her office about a meeting with a social worker was the same day I was going to her for advice.”
“And whatadvicedid she give you?” Carmen asked, a hint of attitude in her tone. “Since everything has been going on here without my knowledge…”
“Nothing has been going on, Carmen. Nobody is plotting against you or anything of the kind.” Emma frowned. “And the head didn’t have much advice for me, but since you seem to think that I’m here to disrupt everything, I’ll tellyouwhat I toldher.”
“And what was that?”
“That I’d hand in my resignation and never step foot inside the school again if it meant Freya could just get on with her life and not worry about being uprooted again.”
Vanessa cleared her throat suddenly. “I know this feels very deceitful, and I know you’re coming to terms with changes within your relationship with Freya, but Emma isn’t the bad guy here, Carmen. She’s suffered just as much as Freya has over the years, and I think it’s important to remember that the only people to blame for all of this are Emma and Freya’s birth parents.”
God, the weight of Carmen’s silence was almost unbearable.
Emma’s fingers tightened slightly around the armrest of the couch. What did this woman want her to say? That Emma would leave and never look back? That wasn’t an option. This town was her home, and it always would be.
“I’m not here to push my way into her life. I never planned for any of this, and I won’t force it. But if there’s a chance I can be there for her, even just a small one, then I want to earn that.”
Carmen glared back at Emma for longer than necessary, and then eventually, she said, “You don’t think this will hurt her?”
“I think not acknowledging it will.” Emma could only be honest from this point on. Tiptoeing around it didn’t seem to be helping her at all. “She knows I’m her sister; we can’t change that.”
Carmen’s tough exterior cracked ever so slightly, her hands now almost shaking in her lap. “She’s only twelve.”
“I know,” Emma whispered. “That’s why I’m doing everything I can not to mess this up.”
