Page 28 of Emma
Vanessa could feel the tension in Emma’s words, the sharpness of a decision made from years of hurt and distance. But she understood that. Emma had fought so hard to carve out a life that was hers, one that was untouched by the chaos of her past. Right now, though, Vanessa was just relieved that Emma was willing to make the first step, even if it wasn’t a huge one. Whether it was a call or something more, it was a sign that the door wasn’t completely closed. “I want you to do what’s best for you,” Vanessa said, her eyes meeting Emma’s with sincerity. “Not anyone else. And yes, that includes Freya. I know you’refond of her and she seems to be almost flourishing now, butyouare the priority to me.”
Emma squeezed Vanessa’s hand in return. “Thanks, babe.” Her gaze drifted to the bottle of wine Vanessa had brought home with her. She raised an eyebrow, the corner of her lips twitching into a small smile. “I think you’d better open that, don’t you?”
Vanessa chuckled. Even through the pain, regardless of where it came from, they always shared these moments together. Moments that reminded them that here, in the safety of their home,everythingwas okay and always would be. “Mm. I think you’re right.” She could only imagine the thoughts swirling around in Emma’s mind. Thoughts of a family she had distanced herself from, thoughts of a potential sister, and thoughts of a life she had yet to accept as possible. There were too many unknowns. Would Emma even want a relationship with Freya? Part of Vanessa knew Emma would, no matter how many walls she built. But if Freya had been removed from the family home, would her new family welcome such a bond? That was something Emma would have to prepare for, no matter how long it took to piece together the truth. “I know you’ve had quite a shock today, but I’m here for you. You know that.”
Emma sighed as she sank back in her seat. “I think the only reason I haven’t lost my mind is because I know I have you.”
Vanessa smiled as she brushed her thumb gently over Emma’s knuckles. “You’re far stronger than you sometimes give yourself credit for. But no matter what, you’llalwayshave me. And if the shit hits the fan with all of this, I’ll be right beside you through it all.”
Emma’s eyes softened, her gaze lingering on Vanessa as she searched her face. “You’re just…I don’t know. I can never put into words what you mean to me.”
“Come on. Chin up.” Vanessa rose to her feet and moved into the kitchen. If they were going to sink a bottle of wine, it wouldbe wise to use glasses. “Everything will be okay, baby. We both know that.”
Emma suddenly wrapped her arms around Vanessa’s waist from behind, the warmth of her body pressing gently to Vanessa’s back. Emma rested her chin on Vanessa’s shoulder, her breath soft against the nape of her neck. “Seriously, thanks for being amazing. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Vanessa turned in Emma’s arms, her fingers stroking through Emma’s hair before she lowered her lips to hers. This was all they needed in the moment. Something familiar. Something that felt like home. As she pulled away, she cupped Emma’s cheek and stroked her thumb against her skin. “Then it’s a good thing we’ll never be without one another.”
Emma’s fingers lightly traced the edges of Vanessa’s collar. “Do you mind if I just take a few days to work through this in my head before I start making any sort of contact?”
“Of course I don’t mind.” Emma had always been a people pleaser, but that never extended to her relationship with Vanessa. With something this huge, Vanessa would never pressure her into making quick decisions. If it took six weeks or six months to find the strength to contact her mother, that was fine. “I’ll bring the wine through. You get the takeout menus. I think after the day you’ve had, something satisfying is definitely on the menu tonight.”
Emma nodded, her shoulders relaxing a little as she moved across the kitchen. She rummaged through the junk drawer and pulled out several menus. When she reached the kitchen door, she turned, her gaze sending the hairs on the back of Vanessa’s neck upright. “Hey, I love you.”
Vanessa could only smile back at her wife, truly blessed to be the one by her side. “I love you, too.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Vanessa moved quietlythrough the kitchen, just the sound of the dishwasher filling the otherwise silent and lonely space. Her eyes strayed to the clock on the wall; Emma was still sleeping. She had tossed and turned all night, her restlessness a reflection of the endless thoughts whirring around in her mind. Vanessa couldn’t begin to imagine what her wife was going through, but she did know what Emma was likely feeling. Confusion. Hurt. Disbelief. Yesterday had been a shock for them both, but Emma would pull through this. Vanessa knew just how strong and capable she was.
Vanessa’s thoughts turned to the potentials. If FreyawasEmma’s sister…how could Emma even begin to process that? Because it wasn’t just the idea of a sibling she’d never known. No, it was the thought of everything Emma had been robbed of. Everything she’d never had the chance to share with someone who was family. This was…God, Vanessa didn’t know what to call it. She just knew she had to remain by Emma’s side for anything she may need.
She sighed and powered on the coffee machine, resting back against the counter as it came to life and the beans started to grind. Usually, the scent of fresh coffee in the morning wouldkickstart her day, but this morning, she couldn’t get out of her head. A small part of Vanessa understood Emma’s refusal to believe this could be true, but there was a nagging at the back of Vanessa’s mind thatdidwonder. If Freya was lying, why would she choose Emma of all people? There were so many other people and faces she could have turned to.
Perhaps Freya had misunderstood something. Maybe she had overheard a half-formed conversation and pieced together a story that wasn’t true. But then what if it was true? What if Emma had a sister she knew nothing about? The idea seemed impossible, yet it had haunted Vanessa for most of the night.
Her mind raced when she allowed herself to think about Freya’s potential past. The idea that a young girl had been left in care, abandoned and alone…it was enough to make her heart clench. While Emma had never been taken into care, shehadbeen abandoned, too. Vanessa didn’t know which was worse. Being taken away from the family home in Freya’s case, or being left to fend for yourself while your parents still lived in the very same house as you, as Emma had experienced.
God, she’s not going to deal with this very well…
Vanessa swallowed. All of this was almost too much to bear. Emma had always carried other people’s pain, it was the empath in her, but this was potentially huge, and if Vanessa knew her wife the way she believed she did, then Emma would carry this for a long time. Vanessa could almost see it in Emma’s eyes already. How she would blame herself for something completely out of her control.
With a sigh, Vanessa filled two cups with coffee. She guessed now was as good a time as any to wake Emma. She yawned and slowly climbed the stairs, trying to be as quiet as possible, even though it was time to begin their day.Time. Emma would absolutely need time this morning. Time to gather herself before diving into another day of uncertainty. Vanessa had woken upa little earlier than usual, wanting to offer Emma a moment of calm before everything picked up again.
She tiptoed into their bedroom, smiling as she watched her wife sleep. Emma’s breath was steady, her face free from the turmoil she was facing for the time being. But Vanessa knew that wouldn’t last. It never did. She placed the coffee cups carefully on the bedside table before settling down on the edge of the bed. Emma stirred, a low groan escaping her lips as she pulled the blanket tighter around her, clearly not ready to face the world just yet.
Emma mumbled into her pillow, “Please tell me today is Saturday.”
Vanessa sighed inwardly, her hand coming to rest on Emma’s back as her fingers traced comforting circles over the fabric of her T-shirt. “Unfortunately not, but I’ve brought coffee, so that’s something.”
Emma peeked over her shoulder, her tired eyes meeting Vanessa’s. “Thanks, babe.”
Vanessa’s gaze lingered on Emma. In this moment, she wanted to protect her wife from the world. She wanted to lock the windows and doors, wrap Emma up, and wait until this all blew over. “I know you’ve only just woken up, but how are you feeling?”
Emma sat up slowly and rubbed her eyes, her shoulders weighed down just as they had been last night. “Honestly, I’m thinking about calling in sick.” As Emma said that, Vanessa noted the guilt at doing so in her eyes. “I thought I could handle it, but yesterday…I had a lesson with Freya. She just stared at me the entire time. It was so awkward.”
Vanessa shifted closer, a brow lifted slightly. She didn’t want Emma to hide from this. It seemed sensible to deal with it now instead of letting it fester. “And when will you eventually go back? I don’t think this is going away on its own.”
“I want to deal with it, I really do, but I don’t know how. My student thinks she’s my sister, babe.” Emma swallowed as she lowered her gaze to her lap. “I don’t want to upset her, but what else am I supposed to do? She can’t be my sister.”
