Page 103 of Burning for Alexander
I blew out a breath and put my fingers to my lips.
I was never getting over Judd Kincaid, was I?
“Fuck that,” I said into the freezing cold night. “There’s nothing to get over! I stopped that in its tracks before it could get started. I am perfectly capable of enjoying my life without him. Watch me.”
I spent the following week forcing myself to put the chief out of my mind and have fun. I worked hard, but I also played hard. Rosie invited me to the town snowball fight, and I agreed on the condition we wouldn’t talk about “other” subjects.
And itwasfun. Honestly.
Things were good.
Until three days after that, when Timber had another random fire inspection. And I lost my fucking mind.
32
KINCAID
Max:No offense but you need to get laid, man. Take advantage of that bitch of a layover in Amsterdam. I’ll see you in two days.
_____________________
When the systempopped up a reminder to revisit Timber again since I’d forgotten to inspect the decorations the last time, I groaned.
“Problem, Chief?” McMasters called out from down the hall.
I opened my mouth to ask him to take this inspection visit, but then I remembered just how happy Alex had seemed lately. I resented the hell out of him for acting like he was suddenly over our… whatever it was… and I also still resented him calling me out while I was just doing my job at the bonfire.
So. Fuck him. He was getting the full heat of my focus for his inspection visit, and he could fuck right off if he didn’t like it.
Part of me knew I would unleash another shitstorm when I showed up, so I put it off until the last possible moment. I waiteduntil I was done for the day and headed out. Instead of pulling up in front of Timber, I passed it and went to Frank’s instead for a beer.
Sujo and his girlfriend Tiffany were there, but they seemed to be in an argument about their Christmas holiday plans with various family commitments, so I stayed well away from them, tucking into my own little corner and pulling out my phone to answer a recent text from Max I hadn’t responded to yet.
I’d finally told him about Alex, but only because I hadn’t wanted him to hear about it from Kaidee or to ask her to keep it a secret. He was pissed.How dare that fucker not give you a chance. You? You’re a catch. Fuck him.
It was his role as my best friend to be protective, but I still hated hearing him speak spitefully about someone I truly cared for.
Max
You still haven’t told me if you’ll come for Christmas. Say yes, bro. Make it happen.
I stared at the text.
Think I’m gonna stay here.
Max
You staying for the kid?
Max had thought the thirteen-year age difference between Alex and me was a problem, but I’d told him the truth: I honestly never thought about our ages anymore when Alex and I were together.
Lay off, brother. I know you’re in my corner and I love you for it. But Alex isn’t a kid. And I don’t blame him for feeling hurt and confused.
Andscared, I didn’t add.
I remembered Alex confessing to me months ago that he was afraid he might fall for someone and have things ripped away again. And I was pretty sure that, in Alex’s mind, that’s exactly what had happened.
I just didn’t know how to get through to him. How to make him realize this second chance was a freakinggift, and the only thing keeping us apart was him.
