Page 27 of Show Me How to Heal
“If you like the guy — and I mean really like him, thinking with your big brain and your heart, not your dick — be honest with him. Nothing good can come out of you basing your whole relationship on a lie.”
I swallowed.
Yeah, I’d been afraid he’d say that. I knew he was right, of course. On some level, I’d known jumping through a thousand hoops only to be able to work an almost minimum wage job for the guy I was crushing on was stupid. As was buying an old pick-up so he wouldn’t see through my lie because I was driving around in a brand-new BMW.
Okay, another big reason for buying the truck had been me barely being able to get in and out of my BMW. As hard as it was to admit, it might be time to give up on low-riding sports cars.
“Lukas?”
“Hmm?”
“Just wanted to see if you’re still there.”
“Yeah, I am. Just thinking about what you’ve said.” Thinking about it and trying to find a way to justifynotfollowing his advice.
My heart sped up thinking about telling Zayne the truth of who I was. My chest tightened, icy cold spreading through my veins.
No.
Nope.
No way.
I couldn’t do it.
He was… my retreat. The one person who was able to see me, just me, because he had no idea who Lukas Richter was.
“Okay. You know, if you need to talk, I’m just a call away. And if you say the word, I’ll get on the first plane toward the US.”
“Thanks,” I said, a little of the cold being washed away by the warmth my brother’s words sent through my chest. “I appreciate it.”
“Nah, don’t mention it. That’s what brothers are for. Anyways, now tell me all the juicy stuff.”
“Eww! You’re my brother! I’m not gonna tell you anything about my first time having sex!”
Moritz started laughing like a maniac. “Dude, I don’t want to know anything about that. I want to know his name, the website of his shop, what he does for fun… all the details — the non-sexual ones.”
I sighed in relief.
“Yeah, I can do that.”
Leaning back against the couch cushions, I closed my eyes and started rehashing the evening in The Bar.
And for the first time since the accident that ended my career, I felt almost whole again.
NEW PHOTOS OF ALLEGED LUKAS RICHTER TURN OUT TO BE HIS TWIN BROTHER — HE’S NOT IN COLOGNE, HIS MANAGER SAYS!
Chapter 7
Luke
In the end, it took another two weeks until the construction workers were done with Zayne’s shop. We’d kept in contact, texted and spoke on the phone a couple of times, but we hadn’t managed to meet up again.
Instead, I’d met up with Corbyn, Mel, Walker, and Raphael again. They were a nice bunch, and I really appreciated them being so welcoming to a literal stranger. Having friends was… new to me. I knew how that sounded; I really did. It sounded ridiculous in my own ears, but it was the truth nonetheless.
I guess being a pro-football player who’d had to keep a huge part of himself a secret meant I’d inevitably managed to keep people out. Of course, I had buddies. Guys I met occasionally. Maybe I’d even call one or two of them friends. But that was it.
Up until now, I hadn’t realized how lonely I’d truly been for the last twelve years. Probably because one needed to have something to know one had missed it before. I’d always said I was fine, and I’d actually believed it. I’d been living my dream, earning millions. I’d had some lucrative jobs as a model. I’d been on TV, and my face had been on billboards. Whenever I’d been home, I’d just wanted to relax, watch a movie, or play a video game. I’d been too busy to realize I didn’t really have people in my life except for my family. Even the good buddies that might be friends were teammates of mine.
