Page 17 of Show Me How to Heal
After the third miss, he finally managed to slide the key inside the lock and turn it, stepped inside, and held the door for me so I could enter without a problem.
The tiny gesture of kindness sent a pleasant shiver through me. A shiver I didn’t understand. My brother had tried holding the door for me, my mom, my friends — and I’d hated it. It had felt condescending, though I’d known it wasn’t meant like that. But with Zayne… it seemed like a nice gesture. A thoughtful one.
Once inside, he turned on the light, illuminating a hallway that already looked a hundred percent like the guy I’d gotten to know for roughly fifteen minutes before we’d decided to take our conversation somewhere more private. There were knotted rugs hanging from the wall and colorful woven rugs on the floor. His furniture was made from dark wood, but the doors of the cabinets had lighter cane inlays. All in all, it manifested his slight hippie vibe, and the place felt super warm and homey. Much warmer than my own cabin, though that might have something to do with the sheer size of that thing.
“Do you want a drink? I can get you a Coke, water, beer, or I might still have some Tequila left from when Avery…” I shook my head, and Zayne immediately trailed off.
“Actually, I’m not thirsty,” I said, wracking my brain to try and find the right words to say. It’d be so much easier if I could just touch him. Fuck, Iwantedto touch him. Wanted to kiss him. Taste him. Feel him.
But I couldn’t. I mean, I wouldn’t fall over if I let go of the crutches or anything. I could even walk without the things… well, I could hobble without them, but that wasn’t sexy and might result in a lot of pain, especially after I’d spectacularly fucked up by overextending myself the last couple of days as it was.
In the end, it was Zayne who broke the silence. “Okay… uhm… I’m gonna be real blunt right now. Sorry in advance. Usually I’d take you to the living room and make out on my couch and maybe relocate to my bedroom later, but… and I’m really not trying to imply you aren’t capable of walking or anything, but would you prefer heading straight to the bedroom? I can get my laptop and we can watch a movie and stuff.”
A weird combination of heat and warmth washed through my body.
Was I supposed to get aroused by his consideration and thoughtfulness? Probably not. But it didn’t matter because my dick decided it liked that amount of care, twitching in my pants.
Maybe it wasn’t Zayne’s thoughtfulness that aroused me but the fact that he’d bluntly invited me to his bed. I definitely was on board with that.
“The bed sounds fine,” I said, trying for a bit of nonchalance, but the raspy sound of my voice betrayed me.
I was going to have sex tonight!
Damn, I hadn’t expected that at all when I’d gone out. Now I was glad I’d taken the time to shower before leaving.
“My bedroom’s upstairs,” Zayne said, nodding towards the stairs.
If I’d still been able to, I’d probably have chased him up the stairs until we fell onto his bed together, one on top of the other, and then we’d kiss passionately.
The reality — unfortunately — was a little different. As in Zayne climbing the stairs ahead of me talking about possible movies or series we could watch, probably to overcome the awkwardness of our limited conversation. To be honest, I couldn’t care less about what movie we watched.
What I did care about was the way Zayne’s ass swayed directly in front of my face. I mean, damn. He had a great ass, even though his loose trousers hid most of the details. But the general outline alone… I wanted to grab it, knead his ass cheeks, maybe bite his round globes or even… I could see myself burying my face between those plush cheeks.
I was glad that when we finally reached the bed my dick already interested in what was about to happen. Leaning my crutches against the wall, I hobbled the last couple of meters towards the bed and carefully sat down while watching Zayne fumble with the laptop sitting on his bedside table.
“There’s this show on Netflix,” he said. “It’s a competition about glass blowing…. Can we watch it?”
“Sure.” I shrugged. I should have come up with a smart comeback about blowing and the possible implications, but my mind had blanked, so I let it go.
Instead, I got comfortable on his big bed, leaning against the dark wooden headboard while trying not to mess up his sheets because I had no idea how the bedding was supposed to work — I’d already tried to google it.
I’d been lost the first time I’d climbed into my bed in the US. I’d immediately missed the blankets, finding only what would be considered a kind of day blanket back home instead, and I was thoroughly confused by the sheet that’d been tucked tightly under only three sides of the mattress but not where my head was supposed to go.
So yeah, I’d immediately ordered normal — well, normal for me — blankets and sheets off Amazon while trying to figure out what to do with the weird ones at home.
But I still hadn’t managed to really figure them out, so it was probably better to be cautious.
Zayne placed the laptop on the foot of the bed before climbing up and sitting down next to me, then leaning his head against my shoulder. It was the first time we really touched, and a wave of heat surged through my body as his unique scent hit my nose. He smelled so fucking good that I couldn’t help but turn my head and burrow my head in his silky, soft hair.
Yeah, that was better.
Zayne seemed to think so, too, because he sighed and wriggled a little in place until he turned towards me, throwing an arm over my stomach.
I held my breath for a couple of seconds, waiting for his next move, but nothing happened. Instead, Zayne sighed contentedly and focused on the show.
I still didn’t care about the show, but I did care about the warm body pressed against mine. And he fit perfectly against me. Like he was made to be at my side.
Fuck, I was getting emotional, but I was allowed to. This was my first time. First time cuddling, first sex, first… almost everything. Zayne didn’t need to know all that, but it was on my mind. I’d never expected it to mean so much to me, but it did.
