Page 79 of Bleed the Shadows
Straddling him brought us closer than ever before, our bodies molded tightly together, every point of contact a hot brand on my fevered skin.
We were both driving toward release, but this wasn’t the same fevered fucking we’d done with Poe. I moved my hips to grind slowly and thoroughly on his dick, savoring every inch of his slide inside me and the pressure on my clit.
He gasped as he thrust, his mouth molded to mine, neither of us wanting to break the kiss as he pushed into me again and again. I kept my mouth locked to his even as my orgasm built at my center like an unstoppable tide.
I wanted his mouth on me when I came, wanted his tongue filling me the way his dick filled my cunt.
He was close too. I felt it in the faster movements of his hips, heard it in the moan he let loose in my mouth. I didn’t know where he ended and I began and there was no room for the fear that would have normally gripped me at the thought. Therewas only Remy’s body molded to mine, his tongue sweeping my mouth as we both rode the wave of our impending release.
We came together. My body shuddered against his and shook with the force of his orgasm as he tunneled through my swollen channel. The car was filled with our muffled moans, our sharp and shallow breaths, and I held onto his shoulders and used the leverage to grind on him, trying to eke out every ounce of pleasure.
When my orgasm finally ended, I pulled away from his mouth with a gasp and tipped my head against his shoulder, my chest heaving as I tried to catch my breath.
He smoothed his palms over my hips and ass, kissing my neck, my exposed shoulder, every patch of skin he could find.
I didn’t lift my head until my breathing had returned to normal.
I dropped a kiss on his lips and he held my face in his hands. Even in the faint light I could see the emotion on his face.
“Maeve, I?— ”
I put my fingers over his lips before he could finish, panic rising inside me.
I wasn’t ready for this. There was too much undone. Too much of my old life that still stalked me like a ghost.
“Not yet.” I saw the flash of pain in his eyes and put my hands to his cheeks. “I feel it too, I promise. But just… not yet. Please.”
He nodded, slid his arms around my waist, and pulled me close. He buried his face in my chest and I held his head in my hands, wondering for the first time if I might really have a life after June.
48
BRAM
I trudgedthrough the woods by the river with my ax in hand. What made for a perfect tree anyway?
I thought about Maeve, tried to imagine whether she’d like a big one or a small one, a skinny one or a full one.
It was cold but I was too busy worrying to feel it. Was this crazy? Stupid? Pathetic?
Once upon a time, pathetic would have been the worst possible outcome, but somehow I found that I didn’t care. I was willing to be pathetic for Maeve if it meant there was even the slightest possibility of making her happy.
I hadn’t thought about Christmas until she mentioned the decorations at the Mountaintop Inn. Then I’d felt like a total dick, because of course Maeve would like Christmas decorations and there we were — Remy, Poe, and me — acting like it was just another month where nothing special was happening when Maeve was working her ass off to plan a Christmas dinner that would probably be the best thing I’d ever tasted.
I stopped in my search to pull a Snickers bar from my pocket, tore it open, and bit into it with relish. It was probably a palesubstitute for the treats Maeve made, but it did the job, and I used the time to look at the trees all around me.
Maybe I should have brought Maeve with me. Was that something girls liked, hunting for a tree in the woods? Or was that one of those situations where they wanted a guy to do the hard thing so they could stay warm and have fun with the decorating?
It was all a mystery to me. I’d never thought much about what women wanted beyond delivering enough orgasms to send them away satisfied.
I’d ask Cassie. Not about the orgasms obviously. About the tree thing.
There were a few possibilities for trees nearby, but I wasn’t sure enough to start chopping, so I shoved the rest of the Snickers into my mouth and walked deeper into the forest. I’d crossed the small river in my thinking spot long ago but I heard the trickle of water from another stream hidden in the woods, and I breathed in the cold and the fresh scent of the pines.
It smelled nice, and the walk was almost… relaxing? Maybe this was how Poe felt when he meditated like a nude freak out on the balcony.
I came to the source of the water, one of Blackwell Preserve’s many creeks and smaller rivers. It tumbled over glistening river rocks and I stepped over it and continued deeper into the woods.
I could have bought a tree from one of the lots that dotted Blackwell and the surrounding areas, but Maeve deserved a real tree, one that hadn’t been grown on a tree assembly line or on some Christmas tree farm. She deserved a tree that was as wild and beautiful as her.
